T-Rex: A new year is coming up. That means it is time to take stock of my life and make resolutions for improvements in the year to come!
God: THERE IS NO CHOICE IN THIS MATTER
T-Rex: RESOLUTION ONE:
T-Rex: eat less chickens!
T-Rex: I mean, eat FEWER chickens. "Fewer" is when you can count them, and "less" is when it's more of a mass and less countable, right? Like, I'd eat less rice, but I'd eat fewer COUNTABLY-MANY grains of rice.
Dromiceiomimus: I think you should resolve to be less obsessed about grammar!
T-Rex: Oh, Dromiceiomimus. Denied!!
Utahraptor: So let's hear these other resolutions!
T-Rex: Of course! AFTER we talk about "less" and "fewer".
T-Rex: Isn't it neat that we have this distinction in English between fewer and less, but the opposite, "more", covers both those cases? Our language is ASYMMETRICAL. If you want to encode countability in your "greater than" comparison word, then good luck! Hah! GOOD LUCK WITH THAT, MY FRIEND!
Utahraptor: Okay!
Narrator: LATER:
T-Rex: I ALSO resolve to get more smooches from ladies.
