Narrator: HOW TO WRITE...
T-Rex: Oh, easy! Writing is an ancient and noble calling, and it is a path which, while staid, can over the course of a lifetime devoted to the quiet study of words offer a deep and abiding satisfaction which -

Narrator: ...EROTICA
T-Rex: AW YES, HERE WE GO

T-Rex: Okay! Writing erotica is in some sense easy because all you have to do is imagine "what would be pretty hot if it happened to me" and then write that down, but in another sense is really difficult because what if someone you know reads it? This is why you'll probably want to use a pen name.
Dromiceiomimus: Should this pen name end in "Steele" or "Hardbody"?
T-Rex: Almost certainly.

Utahraptor: Okay, so I'm L. G. Beetie Hardbody III - now what?
T-Rex: Now start eroticizing!

Utahraptor: What about writers block? Or when I can't construct or maintain either mood OR a theme? WHAT ABOUT WHEN I'M CONSUMED WITH SELF-PITY, CONVINCED I'LL NEVER WRITE ANYTHING GOOD AGAIN AND NEVER HAD IN THE FIRST PLACE??
T-Rex: My friend, all these problems are solved in the same way...

T-Rex: ...by having a scene in which there's only one room left at the hotel and so two characters have to share a bed!
Off panel: ...
Off panel: ...Damn, you're not wrong