T-Rex: The North Pole - AKA SANTA HEADQUARTERS - is on ice. There's no land underneath it! It's ice then ocean then seabed rocks then we're into a science class all about the Earth's core!
T-Rex: And that's really interesting actually but we've got bigger concerns!
T-Rex: Concerns such as Santa's EXTREME VULNERABILITY to global warming. If the polar ice melts, then so too do our hopes for Christmas!
Dromiceiomimus: You really think Santa can make people care about climate change?
T-Rex: Um, yeah, I kinda think CHRISTMAS BEING CANCELLED FOREVER might get people's attention??
Utahraptor: Climate-change deniers will just respond that Santa's not real!
T-Rex: PERFECT.
T-Rex: Because nothing makes you look like a sympathetic, well-adjusted person than going on TV and shouting about how Santa's a big fraud! Even their own friends will wince and whisper "oh no, sweetie, no, stop" when they see that. It's foolproof!
T-Rex: EVERYONE DO THIS RIGHT NOW
Off panel: Yes everyone, we need to politicize Santa before someone else does it first! It's a race to the bottom!
T-Rex: Utahraptor! WINNING RACES
T-Rex: IS THE WHOLE POINT OF RACES
