T-Rex: Okay, so I did some reading into vampires. Vampires are not that awesome, but on the other hand they're actually kinda wicked awesome because they're the only fictional beings with a canonical mental disorder!

T-Rex: Obsessive-compulsive disorder, you guys!

T-Rex: Let's go over vampire facts, shall we? Vampires won't enter your house until they are specifically invited. Obsessive-compulsive? CHECK. If you throw poppy seeds on the grave of a vampire, you'll be safe because they'll be up all night counting the seeds instead of biting you! OCD?
T-Rex: My friends, that is an ULTRA-CHECK.

Utahraptor: Well, I'm not sure if -
T-Rex: If you're being chased by a vampire, cross a bridge!

T-Rex: THEY WON'T CROSS RUNNING WATER.
Utahraptor: Okay, that is kinda compulsive.
T-Rex: They have oddly specific sleep needs AND an irrational fear of certain foods. They're totally OCD, Utahraptor, and knowing this makes it really easy to deduce NEW vampire facts and weaknesses!

T-Rex: If you don't want a vampire to bite you, touch a subway pole while they're watching, and then rub your hands all over your neck!
T-Rex: Hold on, that -
T-Rex: - that one works on pretty much everybody.

April 16th, 2010: As you may have guessed, this comic was meant to follow the comic from two days ago, but I messed up and well here we are. So everyone just needs to imagine that T-Rex spent TWO days researching vampires, as that is now the OFFICIAL HISTORY.

So! This comic was written in CONSULTATION with your friend and mine, Dr. Chris Hastings. In exchange I suggested that one of his characters dress up as a chef sometimes. Will you see that in an upcoming installment of The Adventures Of Dr. McNinja? You'd better, that's all I can say.

This comic was also inspired at MoCCA, when Kind Reader Yuval told me that vampires were vulnerable to counting how many jellybeans are in a jar. While not PRECISELY accurate to the old-skool mythology of vampires, it is pretty close, and I promised him that if I used this FunFact(tm) in a comic then I would share one more clue for the AS-YET-UNSOLVED cryptogram from a few weeks ago. So here is a big clue, as it reduces the search space considerably: the longest word is "fundamental".

I think at this point I will let the puzzle stand for ALL ETERNITY

Speaking of eternity, everyone, two of my shirts are going away for all eternity! NOW IS YOUR CHANCE:

OH ALSO! Friday's FUN-TIME MASK UPDATES: Add "&butiwouldratherbereading=" and sisterclaire or registeredweapon to read Dinosaur Comics versions of Sister Claire or Registered Weapon.

One year ago today: i did a search and nobody is calling bad baloney "failoney". what the heck, internet, you shouldn't need me to think up these permutations for you

– Ryan