Narrator: JOKES EXPLAINED PRESENTS: "CONFUCIUS SAY"
T-Rex: This vaguely-racist form of comedy relies upon the double-entendre! It narrates the advice of a man called "Confucius" who delivers many a "bon mot".

T-Rex: For example: "Confucius say... man who run in front of car get tired!"

T-Rex: Ho ho! Did you catch the comedy there? There are two meanings in that phrase! If you didn't get it, don't worry - the key to emulating understanding is often just to repeat the last word or phrase. Fake a laugh, say "Hah! TIRED." and you will be SET.

Utahraptor: Was there a real-life Confucius, T-Rex, or is he merely a convenient fictional device?
T-Rex: Well!

T-Rex: As you know, there was in fact a real Confucius. He lived in the 5th century in Ancient China (then called "China") and was and is an incredibly well-respected philosopher!
Utahraptor: Indeed!
T-Rex: So yeah, you've got to be careful, because the real Confucius said many non-hilarious things.

T-Rex: Phrases like "they who know the truth are not equal to those who love it" are not meant to be laughed at! SO DON'T EVEN TRY.
T-Rex: To conclude, I hope people needed this joke explained, because otherwise I've been hardcore wasting my time today!