T-Rex: So the average adult is supposed to think about sex like, a billion times a day, right? Sometimes more?
T-Rex: ...Especially if they're bored?
T-Rex: Well I'M going to be ABOVE-average, Dromiceiomimus, and I don't mean I'm going to think about sex two billion times per day! Instead, I'm going to think really productive thoughts instead of sexy ones. Every time I start to think "sex" I'll instead think "How can I make things better? How can I solve ALL the problems?"
T-Rex: And I'm not allowed to answer those questions with "sex" either!
Narrator: LATER:
Utahraptor: So how's the problem-solving going?
T-Rex: Honestly: not so well!
T-Rex: The thing is, I've had YEARS of practice at thinking sexy thoughts; I've got that down COLD. But I'm a rank amateur when it comes to this!
Utahraptor: None of those skills transferred over, huh.
T-Rex: I'm SINCERELY SURPRISED by how poorly my erotic imagination prepared me for solving such serious world issues.
Book cover: I'm Sincerely Surprised By How Poorly My Erotic Imagination Prepared Me For Solving Such Serious World Issues
Book cover: The T-Rex Story
Book cover: “A biography full of surprises, not the least of which is how poorly T-Rex's erotic imagination fared on the world stage." -The New Yorker
