Narrator: SOLVE ALL YOUR RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS COMICS
Narrator: a choose your own adventure comic that also solves all your relationship problems
T-Rex: Nice!

Text: You're Captain Blam. You're on an alien space ship, armed only with your trusty dehumanizer ray!
T-Rex: Turn to panel 3!

Text: You glance around you, seeing two obvious exits. The first is a ornate pink door, with the words "RELATIONSHIP TOWNE" written in loopy script across its face. To its right is another door, forged out of solid steel. Above it is a neon sign that says "LET'S SHOOT SOME DUDES!". It flashes once per second. It looks - it looks SPLENDID.
Dromiceiomimus: To enter Relationship Towne, turn to panel 4!
T-Rex: To shoot some dudes, turn to panel 5! You probably wanna shoot some dudes.
T-Rex: Shoot some dudes!!

Text: As you put your hand on the door to Relationship Towne, you decide to want to shoot some dudes instead.
T-Rex: SO AWESOME!!
Utahraptor: Turn to panel five!

Text: You fire your dehumanizer ray on every alien you see! The explosions are so great. They're awesome. Each one is better than the last. Oh my goodness. Suddenly, you realize relationships are based on trust!
T-Rex: To shoot some more aliens, re-read this panel again and again!
Utahraptor: To explore your feelings, turn to panel 6.

Text: You're done shooting aliens and they are all dead. It's cool though. You call up your sweetie and apologize for things you've done wrong in the past, and promise to do better in the future. You tell her you love her. You mean it in a way you haven't meant for years. All your relationship problems are solved!
T-Rex: Yesssssss