T-Rex: Hello, recipient of this card! I am your friend, so this is me pulling you aside and whispering into your ear.

Narrator: YOU ARE TOTALLY WRONG
Narrator: a web card

T-Rex: It's okay. Some of us were born wrong, some achieve wrongness, and some have wrongness thrust upon 'em. You are maybe all three?
Dromiceiomimus: Yeah, it's hard to tell but I think you might've been wrong even as a baby.
T-Rex: You were a wrong baby who grew up wrong. The wrong kind of wrong. It's better you hear it from a friend.

T-Rex: But we're your friends and we love you!
Utahraptor: YES! We love you.

Utahraptor: We love you even though we're at this fancy dinner party for all the correct people, and all the correct people are there, and you've shown up wearing an inflatable animal pool ring around your waist. This is a metaphor.
T-Rex: ...This might not be a metaphor.
Utahraptor: Oh god.

T-Rex: Okay, good chat, recipient of this card! We're still pals, right?
T-Rex: Okay! Remember that if you think we're not pals anymore you are only compounding your wrongness!
T-Rex: Peace!

September 12th, 2013:

Today To Be or Not To Be, my choose-your-own-path version of Hamlet, is out for real! If you missed out on the crazy-awesome Kickstarter you can get the book at your local book store, or on Amazon, or digitally, or basically in a zillion other ways. Check out hamletbook.com for more details, and I hope you like my crazy book! It is a really good book if I do say so myself!

One year ago today: you can argue that clark is merely superman suffering a psychotic break and pretending he doesn't have powers, begging for relief from the constant shouting of planet earth and a silence that will never come, but that's - that's awful. that's just awful

– Ryan