Narrator: HOW TO USE TWITTER
T-Rex: Twitter is a cool social network because complete strangers can message you at any time, and there's no way to turn that off!!
T-Rex: So here's how to get started on Twitter!
T-Rex: First, you'll need to choose a name. All names on Twitter start with an "@", so a good name might be @cooldude, except that's taken, as is @coolguy, @guywhoiscool, @cooltwitterguy, and @heyilike2becool.
T-Rex: Instead, fall back to your second choices, such as @abirdpoopedonme, @pooponmyhead, or @ohitouchedapoop.
T-Rex: Now compress your greatest and most sublime ideas down to 140 characters!
Utahraptor: It's easy!
Utahraptor: Instead of "But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun," try ".@juliet is hottttt!! seriously guys wtf".
T-Rex: This leaves you more room for "hashtags", like #babes, #hotbabes, and #sunmetaphors.
Twitter ad: EACH OF US HAS ONLY A FINITE NUMBER OF DAYS IN OUR TOO BREIF LIVES; NONE KNOW HOW MANY OR HOW FEW THEY HAVE LEFT BEFORE DEATH, AS IT MUST, COMES TO US ALL
Twitter ad: BE SURE TO SPEND YOURS... ON twitter.com
Twitter Logo: friggin do it, you guys™
