Narrator: A HALLOWE'EN TALE OF TERROR
T-Rex: One day Bill got mummified! This is the same Bill as the last time, so he's already a werewolf, but now he's dead and he's gonna become a mummy.

T-Rex: Bill is having a difficult day!!

T-Rex: Like all mummies, Bill's skin and organs were made to resist decay, either intentionally (as in ancient Egypt) or accidentally (as when someone dies in either a very cold or very dry place). Unfortunately for Bill, he became a mummy just as "mummia" was coming back in fashion!

Utahraptor: And what's "mummia"?
T-Rex: Oh, just a powder made from GROUND-UP MUMMIES.

T-Rex: It was THOUGHT to have miraculous medicinal properties if you gobbled it, so that's why Renaissance people were cannibalizing long-dead folks. Only that was expensive, so mummia started to be made from the recently dead too! And that's why the past is horrible, and we should never live there.

T-Rex: True horror is other people; THE END.
T-Rex: P.S.: BILL DID NOT GET BETTER