T-Rex: Hello! We are friends on Facebook and I kinda actually have no idea who you are. You invited me to a party in a distant city, soooo... is that where you live?

Narrator: I GUESS WE MET SOMEWHERE ONCE?
Narrator: a web card

T-Rex: I looked at your profile. I dunno. It seems weird to say "Sorry, I've already got enough friends", but I wouldn't even be saying that. I'd be saying, "Sorry, I've already got enough - strangers? Who are aware of what movies I liked when I set this up years ago?"
T-Rex: Oh, I looked at your pictures too.
T-Rex: You - get drunk an awful lot?

Utahraptor: Maybe you met while intoxicated and both forgot!
T-Rex: But I never drink that much!

T-Rex: I figure, either I am forgetting entire friendships and sections of my past wholesale, which is TERRIFYING, or I'm living split-personality double lives in another city, which seems PRETTY INTRIGUING.
Utahraptor: And your other personality is also called "T-Rex" and uses the same Facebook account.

T-Rex: Yep! In either case: dear recipient of this card, thank you for the invitation on Facebook, but I will not be attending the party!
T-Rex: ...Okay!
T-Rex: If you have any idea how we know each other, drop me a line!