T-Rex: The best tattoo in the world exists.

T-Rex: And I'VE got it!

T-Rex: Unfortunately this tattoo is so good that even merely viewing it causes everyone to instantly find themselves despising all other tattoos (for not meeting its new and glorious standard) and in so doing it ruins all tattoos for everyone else, so I've covered it with your standard lime green flesh-coloured makeup.

Utahraptor: You're performing a fine public service.
T-Rex: Happy to!

Utahraptor: But maybe you could show it to me, so I could get the same tattoo too?
T-Rex: Ah, I wish I could, but part of what makes it the best tattoo in the world is it's absolutely unique.

T-Rex: However, the SECOND-best tattoo in the world is still available: that's a ruler that's practical for a few months until your skin changes, and then it's useless.
T-Rex: To answer your question: yes, there is an ABYSSAL gulf between first and second place!