add a new regret How much can you expect to regret ? recent regrets we were angels rosug shingn the kdogglr an yuo liek roylied up nar beeing sucha bad spellr that evryone on the regret indix nose you r an imbisell having a huge throbbing erection r,ight now eating a huge marshmallow being cruel to Kento being cruel to be kind, but not for free Mighty Jill Off being cruel to be kind jilling off jacking off being born after Freddy Mercury died, but before Jean Luc Picard was born reading The Original of Laura in Tehran killing yourself wondering who we would eat first if a plane carrying all the regret index regulars crashed in the Andes making cum cheese having anal cancer Glee making Lima Ohio seem wholesome possibly losing a friend because of distance, and your own stupidiity not getting the joke regrets of late [ show all 15647 regrets ] recent comments (1) wondering who we would eat first if a plane carrying all the regret index regulars crashed in the Andes (1) jilling off (2) that most abstract art ends up looking like sexual organs (12) that it is possible for one of the regret index regulars to die, and then nobody here will ever know it and we'll just think "oh, I guess he slash she just got sick of all the regrets about cum and Kento and song lyrics and stopped coming around here" (1) being born after Freddy Mercury died (2) psychics (1) spoilers below (1) Flash! ahhh ahhh! (3) that you can understand hating Whedon, and it's a stretch but you guess you could understand a dislike for Fey, but hating both at the same time just seems unnatural (2) thinking something had a really deep symbolic meaning and then its creator admits it was completely arbitrary (3) that this world is not yet ready to accept saints (2) that yes, yes, we get it, you would have been internet famous if your friend hadn't beaten you to it (2) joseph smith vore fetishism (2) that your name doesn't show up on google's search guess autofill but "bucket saga," which you "coined" does (2) kissing a girl just to kiss a girl (2) looking at pictures of adorable puppies (1) L,,,,,,,J (2) killing for that first edition japanese Charizard card (3) getting your dog an abortion (1) sitting down a bit too fast on a hard chair and hurting your beans (1) being crazy boy (1) guzzling cum (1) thinking you got all the pus out of a zit but the next day it's just as infected and swollen as ever (1) going to that party where all the girls are making out for fun like you are in someone's fantasy but not making out with anyone (3) people asking "how was your weekend" when you worked both Saturday and Sunday, and it wasn't really a weekend (5) that two thousand and ten won't be the year you kiss a girl either (4) that pining isn't an Olympic sport, because man guys (1) having a headache but not sleeping because you want to finish a long internet video (1) putting that mirror in the other mirror and finding out too late that there's a violinist and a pianist watching you (2) liking your coffee the way you like your tea, hot with a little bit of sugar and milk (3) dogma (1) getting food poisoning by eating those eight year old breasts (3) that using twitter's list new list feature you added a list of people you've shagged (4) how weird sexual organs are, I mean really, they're all pretty weird (2) saying a comment to a regret that makes you sound like more of a jerk than you intented (2) sometimes, occasionally, reading fanfiction (1) getting pizza in your mouth (2) that, unless you're very tired and not thinking clearly, you only just realized that the double and triple negatives "Never not being a loser" and "Never not being not a loser" mean exactly the same thing! (2) feeling like there isn't much in this world that isn't in some way derivative, not getting why people get so pissed off at derivation (1) writing intentionally combative regrets in a vain attempt to liven up the slowly dying regret index (5) not knowing that Joss Whedon was one of the writers for Titan AE, that explains it being a derivative pile of overstylized garbage with only cult appeal (1) announcing your plans to become a subscription based site shortly after removing a substantial chunk of your best content, Hulu (1) that this has apparently slowly sunken from being the Regret Index, to being the Kento Index (2) taking an online iq test and getting a score of eighty four (9) NOT EXISTING (2) getting kind of turned on by this recording of Pierrot Lunaire, hey Rachel, can you tell who I am (1) VERY PUBLICLY AND VERY LOUDLY DECIDING NOT TO COMMENT ON THE REGRET THAT CLAIMS IT WILL NEVER BE COMMENTED ON, JUST TO POKE FUN AT ITS AUTHOR'S FUTILITY (8) looking for salient features and not necessary and sufficient conditions for something to count as music (1) that I, Kento, have a seven inch penis (2) strapping your hands across my engines (1) black coffee (1) dresing up as Kento for Halloween (3) that certain nutritional deficiencies can occur on the raw food diet, including calcium, iron, Btwelve, protein, and calories (2) juggling four friends before one found out and left, followed by the one closest to him, then lying to keep the other two around without knowing about eachother for eight months (1) being a dude who looks like a dude who looks like a woman (10) equating marriage with relationships, when they're pretty different dynamics (4) calling your depression a serious medical condition, yet refusing medical help and burdening your friends with demands to cure you, then being surprised when your friends come to resent you (4) that Glee going nowhere, and with lots of pitch correction all of a sudden (11) that rachel is the sainted one who turns all regret index angst into witty wordplay and enjoyment for all (1) that "begging the question" is a horrible translation of the original Latin phrase, and the "incorrect" usage actually makes more sense in parsing (4) having two more Bud Light with Limes left in your fridge that you have to drink, and whatever they're fine, they taste like flat ginger ale and you can deal, but ugh two more is kind of pushing it (7) really wondering if people on Facebook take your fake lesbian marriage seriously (7) that brief, immature self injury phase you went through in your teenage years (1) not preceding your regret with a negative word effectively making your regret into a confusing double negative that takes fifteen extra seconds to vote on because you're confused as hell (1) always assuming that librarians are hot young women with short hair, glasses, no makeup, and a really cute smile, which is damn sexy (3) needing to know how to write a casual cover note that doesn't immediately put people off you (1) inexplicably leaving your workplace for long periods of time, forcing your coworker to skip lunch and bathroom breaks to cover for you (1) always turning the page on your calendar like three weeks too late (1) that fanwikis are destined to fail because anyone who spends enough time on the computer to contribute to them has the social skills of a brain damaged baboon (2) wondering if it's actually true that chicks dig scars (5) Not checking a beer for a cigarette butt before taking a large, large sip (2) always assuming that librarians are wrinkled old ladies with white hair, glasses, bright pink lipstick and a really phony smile, which isn't sexy at all (8) getting into a fight over what the correct way to crack an egg is (2) that you'll probably just go as a sexy librarian again this Halloween, which is to say you'll wear the same clothes you wear every day (2) ELECTROPLATING YOUR PENNIES (1) writing T Rex slash Utahraptor fanfiction (1) not saying frig enough (1) ELECTROCUTING YOUR PENIS (2) being a stupid freak with low self esteem (3) wishing to have an objective view on the subject of your worthlessness or lack thereof (1) realizing that you and Kento are basically foils, because Kento reveals everything about his life be it fact or fiction whereas you try very hard to reveal nothing at all (1) befriending that guy on the bus (1) that it's impossible to sneeze with your mouth open (1) telling someone they were perfect and you'd be in love with them, if only they weren't so ugly (1) that your secret girlfriend, Mary Louise Parker, is on TV tonight, meaning you will get overexcited and in the morning wake up naked save for a CRT as a hula skirt and shards of broken screen in your penis (2) wondering what penguin would tase like (1) not really believing that Jack Kerouac fellated Gore Vidal, nor that Jack Kerouac may have been bisexual, yet being unwilling to brand Gore Vidal a liar (2) eating bugs (1) that Strong Bad's emails are no longer podcast (1) vagina dentata (1) not knowing every ABBA song by heart, yet (1) going to Transylvania so you could eat puppies for breakfast (1) trying to incorporate Fifty Cent into your life (3) regret number one seven five two five (3) that time in third grade when you did a report on Iraq and you had to make a flag, but you couldn't draw five pointed stars so you made six pointed star instead, so you ended up making an Iraqi flag with three stars of David on it (2) waiting until the very middle of the night to put a load of clothes in, so that you will have to wait another hour to sleep so you can transfer them to the drier (1) that "Marty" shows up as "nasty" in your phone's predictive spelling dictionary (27) wanting to be poor (1) wondering where we'll go for shocks next now that TwoGirlsOneCup has blown the doors of coprophilic vomit fetishism wide open (1) getting that chinese food for lunch

search regrets Look for regrets involving top regrets making up statistics about fridge deaths, but not bothering to write them down and forgetting them (1.0000) spending ten minutes to make coffee this morning and forgetting to drink it (1.0000) playing furcadia (1.0000) having nothing, I mean literally absolutely fucking nothing, to do (1.0000) trying to use ebay to gague how much an item is worth, but finding only "buy now" prices that range from fourteen to a hundred and thirty dollars (1.0000) [ show more ] bottom regrets breastfeeding (0.0000) managing to resist the perverse curiosity to see TwoGirlsOneCup, so far (0.0000) tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (0.0000) Allison Iraheta being voted off American Idol (0.0000) christmas (0.0000) [ show more ] most voted regrets taking the hugest dump (1316/0.8772) not hooking up with Ryan (641/0.9203) memorising every Star Trek episode (423/0.1296) that it took Ryan like a year to get the Regret Index back up again (411/0.7370) not starting that final paper sooner (403/0.8519) [ show more ]