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recent regrets

Bikini clad Swedish chef makes meal while sunbathing
Bikini clad Swedish cop makes arrest while sunbathing
stealing that innocent girl's Mars Bar from the remote cottage
a group of dissolute rock stars lured an innocent girl to a remote cottage where, having plied her with drugs, they had their way with her, including various sex acts involving a Mars Bar
I want to fuck you like a Milky Way
I wanna fuck a dragonfly
Grab, shake, bite, gouge, puncture, split, punch colon It's enough to put anyone off sex
it's gotta be dogs simply because they are a fuckable animal that are readily available to pretty much anyone, though I believe it may have been horses at some point in history
wondering what nonhuman animal humans most frequently have sex with
pitching an A Team robot featuring Usain Bolt as Hannibal, Liam Hemsworth as Face, Terry Gene Bollea as Mr T, and an ancient filter feeding lobster as "Howling Mad" Murdoch all getting hand jobs
anomalocaridid trunk limb homology revealed by a giant filter feeder with paired flaps colon the movie
pitching an A Team reboot featuring Usain Bolt as Hannibal, Liam Hemsworth as Face, Terry Gene Bollea as Mr T, and an ancient filter feeding lobster as "Howling Mad" Murdoch
athlete Usain Bolt, actor Liam Hemsworth and former wrestler Hulk Hogan
The ancient lobster as tall as Usain Bolt
helping Jack Reacher give a reacharound to a walrus
Ancient Lobster Walk
helping Kento jack in a walrus
Ancient Lobster Shaved, Possibly Kissed by Animal Rights Activists
Ancient Lobster Saved, Possibly Killed by Animal Rights Activists
helping kento jack off a walrus
[ show all 117409 regrets ]

recent comments

(2) helping your uncle jack put on a donkey show, with a matinee on saturdays and sundays and wednesdays too in the high season
(1) helping your uncle jack off a horse
(1) Our heroes don't look like Matt Damon
(1) Pokemon Lying Flat Against the Ground and Run Away Like a Little Bitch
(1) topping for Steve Harwell in Takin' the Back Streets VII
(8) remembering that scend in Pokemon where Ash kisses that Latias in human form, and thinking that's probably Kento's best bet
(1) the kid from Lazytown is a quarter of a century old
(1) two legit two leak
(1) tweeting to a singer that you want to take a shit in her scanties
(1) tweeting to a celebrity that you want to take a shit in their skull
(2) he smashed too hard
(2) thinking that if Kento ever snaps and does something terrible to other people instead of just himself, Ryan would hand over our IP addresses in a heartbeat
(2) they aren't booing, they're saying "Boo ernie!"
(7) wondering which you would choose, to be a lesbian with a penis or a straight man with a vagina
(1) Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
(3) hoping it's not "fist or be fisted by a Star Trek cast member"
(1) anyway, if "fisting or being fisted by a Star Trek cast member" is on your bucket list, I'm pretty sure that Takei would oblige you either way
(2) Music From Another Room is a romantic comedy that follows the exploits of Danny, a young man who grew up believing he was destined to marry the girl he helped deliver as a five year old boy when his mother's best friend went into emergency labor
(4) meetgraham dot com dot au
(4) Double Penetration Edged Sword in the Lodestone Cold Filtered Hand Ground Slow Roasted Traditionally Poured and Puddled Adobe Flash!!! Aaahh!!! Real Hot Dirty Pocket Pool Monsters
(30) still only seeing black, white, and blue
(3) the death of Chris Lydon
(2) the death of Garry Marshall
(6) playing Entry of the Gladiators over the Republican National Convention coverage
(1) guessing that Peppa Pig just has Pedro Pony put it in her butt to avoid getting pregnant with some kind of equuporcine abomination
(1) drawing a picture of Kento being Eiffel Towered by Penn Jillette and a camel
(5) any smooth bottom intersted into top muscle pm me
(1) turtles
(2) just now reflecting on how utterly ridiculous it was to cast Patrick Stewart as a Frenchman
(1) Luke McCarthy, XXVIII, is said to have made a woman drink his blood before sinking his teeth into her thigh
(6) using the screen name "black guy plus white girl equals hot"
(1) this freakin horse
(1) this freakin dog
(3) this freakin guy
(1) It's World Emoji Day! Teen girls, code an emoji that's unique like you
(1) damn, I've been maintaining my amateur status because I want to dog in the Olympics
(1) begged incest
(1) When you turn the Trump Pence logo upside down, it literally looks like a handjob
(1) meeting Brian Peppers
(3) using the word "waffletastic"
(2) in light of the horrible attack in Nice, France, I have postponed tomorrow's news conference concerning my vice presidential announcement while I think of something worse than losers to call the French
(4) that i deleted all the spam comments, hah hah hah OH WELL
(1) wondering what your favourite meme is
(1) dat boi
(5) Peppa Meets Oasis
(3) holding the lime
(2) holding the line
(4) Category colon Ash dick infection
(1) giving a hand job to the Smoothie King on request
(1) they ruin everything
(2) wondering how hard it would be to program a self driving car to seek out and collect Pokemon for you
(1) wondering why Chris Lydon needs to raise money on kickstarter even though he has the money to maintain a harem of fat gay Asian sex slaves
(1) If you went back in time and told me that in the near future, one of the most nerd accessible directors would make an all female Ghostbusters reboot and it would become this bizarre hill to die on, I would have laughed it off
(1) having no clue who Kento is
(4) they DO move in herds!
(1) not having a jambalaya based on you
(2) when they made Stephen Fry, they broke the mould, and then they used it to make Kento
(1) Pokemon Cum
(1) ogre pair
(1) butt bustin' makes me feel good
(1) never really understanding the appeal of Bill Murray
(2) incautiously falling for a witch
(2) cuties
(1) that it's really hard to hold those cups in your hooves
(1) we're gonna build a walrus pool and make the walrus pay for it
(3) drawing a picture of Kento screaming "YOU'RE NOT MY REAL AQUATIC MAMMALIAN SEXUAL PARTNER!" at a hippo and being told to go to his room by Chris Lydon
(2) because it's American made
(1) Bob Wehadababyitsaboy
(2) not, "per woman", that would be stupid, there's only one and a half gallons in each woman on average
(2) wondering if there is a special term for fisting two menstruating women at once
(1) Time Travelling Kento coming back to have sex with himself
(2) remember Trump, he's back, in GOP form
(8) checking this site after many, many years
(2) do you have any idea how much it costs to qualify as a padawan, let alone a Jedi Knight
(1) He liked to post innocent looking links that led to a photo of a My Little Pony doll he had jerked off on
(2) you should legally change your middle name to something really British like Crumpet or Boris or Benny Hill or something
(1) for me it's always going to be NPor, closely followed by RSte and EJac
(4) it's also possible that I might just change my mind one day for no real reason
(3) holding a party for Kento's birthday at the Sheraton Addis in the Omo Room
(3) that everyone keeps invoking a divorce analogy for Brexit, and you wish they would use something more appropriate, like, say, two dogs gradually decoupling after the knotting subsides
(1) going to that Sausage Festival
(2) Rick Moranis
(1) Five Hospitalized After Tony Robbins Urges Them to Walk Over Hot Coals
(2) Starsuckers
(2) wondering why it is that whenever an American newspaper seeks celebrity comments on an issue related to the UK they always cite JK Rowling first, and wondering if the Biritsh public likewise holds Ms Rowling's opinions in such esteem
(1) Donald Trump praises Scots for "taking back control of their country" by voting overwhelmingly to remain in the EU
(4) Pokemon Life As a House and Star Wars
(1) the two cartoon dicks JMW Turner painted on The Slave Ship
(1) that coming five or six times in about thirty hours makes it so difficult to masturbate
(2) straddling Kento and pounding his bottom
(4) naming your daughter Rooney
(1) screwing everything up so badly
(2) the incident has left me feeling tainted and worried that if I am caught short in similar circumstances there maybe someone hiding in the bushes filming me
(1) learning to say 'where is the bathroom' in every language so that when people ask if you speak any given language you can say "I don't know much, but I know 'where is the bathroom', that may be all I need to know"
(2) believing in god
(13) President Housekeeping, starring Hulk Hogan
(3) being perceived as a joke
(1) wondering whether Angel Colon is the gayest name possible
(1) your diet of verbal abuse and walrus spoff

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top regrets

kind of loving Gene Hunt, that magnificent bastard (1.0000)
the goddamn deliberately disabled modems Earthlink sent out to customers in the early aughts, cannot enable DHCP without "paying" extra, and using PPoE plus a router with DHCP disables streaming video, FU Earthlink (1.0000)
bragging about being from West Virginia (1.0000)
shows that only have eight episodes per season (1.0000)
regrets about pony blowing (1.0000)
[ show more ]

bottom regrets

sucking her left one until she had a breastgasm (0.0000)
telling the Philippines authorities that Kento is a drug mule (0.0000)
using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
killing the California girls (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
[ show more ]

most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12561/0.9789)
Kento (2760/0.9993)
turtles (2607/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2431/0.0004)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2336/0.5076)
[ show more ]

most discussed regrets

tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (98)
I would want to bang Jewel if I were not in a relationship (37)
still only seeing black, white, and blue (30)
the actress (29)
wondering whether the kids who are, say, three or four years old now will eventually develop their own interests or if they will be cursed to be nothing but proxies for their dumbass manchild fathers' lost youth and be doomed to like Star Wars for eternit (26)
[ show more ]