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all the beach volleyball images in Top Gun turning me into someone gay?
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recent regrets

fuck marry kill, Zoolander, Zeddicus Zu'l Zorander, Zachor Clitcaster O'dirge
fuck marry kill, a piece of shit, a disgusting faggot, many other things
I'm a crazy Polish countess who likes a challenge
tell me something I don't know
that I'm despicable, a piece of shit and a disgusting faggot, among many other things
fuck marry kill, Disco Duck, Dooby Duck, Destroyer Duck
trying not to suck Disco Duck, nineteen seventy seven
trying not suck dinosaur dick, agenty fiftyseven
Zeddicus Zu'l Zorander
trying not to suck your own dic, agent ninety nine
trying not to suck your own dick, double O seven
decking the halls with a large papy
FUCK!ing the bees with gay apparel
decking the halls with Armenian Apparel
decking the halls with American Apparel
decking the halls with Asian apparel
dicking the balls with gay apparel
decking the halls with gay apparel
pan decal
lap dance
[ show all 132697 regrets ]

recent comments

(4) tell me something I don't know
(1) taking a dump so big your pants fit better
(1) feeling it coming in the air tonight
(2) I'm going home to sleep with my wife
(2) wondering what the resident regret index medical expert has to say about the possible adverse reactions of putting mustard on one's penis
(3) the thing in the prequels where they were like "well, the only Twi'lek females we've seen so far have been strippers, so we'd better make all female Twi'leks, even the Jedi, dress like strippers or else people will be confused"
(2) wondering if breeding for France automatically means having sex with a twelve year old girl, here in the early twenty first century
(8) wondering if Chris Lydon or the walrus ever fails to climax, and, if so, whether Kento sees it as a personal failure
(3) liking your tea like you like your sex, nonconsensual
(1) writing that fanfiction where Kento and Chris Lydon are captured and raped by hugecocked African savages and they have to fight their way out with machine guns and then they have butt sex
[ show more ]

search regrets

Look for regrets involving

top regrets

the goddamn deliberately disabled modems Earthlink sent out to customers in the early aughts, cannot enable DHCP without "paying" extra, and using PPoE plus a router with DHCP disables streaming video, FU Earthlink (1.0000)
kind of loving Gene Hunt, that magnificent bastard (1.0000)
spam fritters (1.0000)
your dyslexia flaring up (1.0000)
regrets about pony blowing (1.0000)
[ show more ]

bottom regrets

tits (0.0000)
cornholing Willie Mays (0.0000)
doing Harambe jokes eighteen months later (0.0000)
arresting a king in his own palace (0.0000)
not eating out Kento (0.0000)
humping Jewel's bust (0.0000)
killing the California girls (0.0000)
not being Kento (0.0000)
The Curious Cans of Benjamin Buttocks (0.0000)
having impure thoughts about a teenage Kimmie Gibbler (0.0000)
having Gordon Ramsay voice an orangutan who does nothing but masturbate and defecate (0.0000)
shaving Jewel's bush, meow (0.0000)
slamming your dick in the car door (0.0000)
bellowing DARKNESS MY OLD FRIEND (0.0000)
twats (0.0000)
smashing a birdhouse with your flaccid dick (0.0000)
stealing that girl's bra from the communal laundry room (0.0000)
banging a Tim Burton heroine (0.0000)
stabbing Isabella Rossellini and ejaculating in the wound (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
sucking her left one until she had a breastgasm (0.0000)
pussy (0.0000)
Owen and Mzee (0.0000)
masturbating with your cut off hand (0.0000)
brunettes (0.0000)
telling the Philippines authorities that Kento is a drug mule (0.0000)
teabagging Raymond Burr (0.0000)
telling that girl in second grade who insisted that you were "the boss of her" to show you her vagina (0.0000)
having sex with a girl who looked a lot like Christina Ricci (0.0000)
holding your boobs when you run down the stairs (0.0000)
using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
licking Danish remoulade off of Chris Lydon's erect penis (0.0000)
the death of Sylvia Browne (0.0004)
turtles (0.0004)
breasts (0.0135)
regret index greatest tits, Kento (0.0153)
buying multiple copies of the book "To Be or Not to Be" by the incredibly handsome New York Times bestselling author Ryan North (0.0161)
fisting Go Ikeda (0.0182)
slamming your dick in Jewel's boobs (0.0185)
saying no when you should have said yes (0.0217)
having a lesbian crush on Alex Dainis (0.0233)
dongs (0.0297)
staring at Bicoid Babe's ass seriously (0.0310)
Twin Long Rods #Two (0.0345)
asian racks (0.0357)
fisting Kevin Bacon at home (0.0370)
hating reality TV shows (0.0385)
sexy makeouts (0.0400)
going to the Sweatiest Ass in the World world premiere with Kento (0.0408)
being awesome (0.0410)
going slightly out of your way to step on that crunchy looking leaf (0.0433)
consistent pubic lice (0.0455)
dinosaurs (0.0466)
breastfeeding (0.0526)
being the real deal (0.0526)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0541)
learning to play the xylophone (0.0543)
playing Dungeons & Dragons with Tim Duncan (0.0556)
how weird The Regret Index becomes at night (0.0556)
Allison Iraheta being voted off American Idol (0.0556)
being a nerd (0.0580)
drinking delicious lemonade and popping wheelies (0.0588)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0606)
boobs (0.0606)
managing to resist the perverse curiosity to see TwoGirlsOneCup, so far (0.0625)
demanding proof (0.0625)
building a castle out of the junk in a junkyard (0.0625)
this video (0.0667)
really not regretting the number one four two eight at all (0.0714)
having to wear glasses (0.0714)
sleeping with that slim ugly huge breasted double D cup bucktoothed seventeen year old national merit scolar bikini model cellist goth, and by the way, screw you MB (0.0714)
that Jewel has huge boobs, seriously (0.0714)
your love of eighties action movies (0.0727)
not wearing panties (0.0769)
discovering webcomics (0.0769)
choosing Squirtle (0.0769)
defending the bullied kid (0.0769)
playing Dungeons & Dragons with Tim Duncan (0.0769)
playing it loud (0.0769)
futurama (0.0769)
getting FOUR fish hooks stuck in your scrotum (0.0769)
boobs, vaginas, asses, and such (0.0769)
sprinking chocolate chips on your beloved's breasts as you knead them (0.0769)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0811)
making a fort in your living room out of couch cushions (0.0816)
dinosaur comics (0.0833)
that walruses, goats, and swans represent the Leviathan, Behemoth, and Ziz, respectively, of the regret index (0.0833)
not supporting the President (0.0833)
"Allison Iraheta being voted off American Idol" being voted off the bottom regrets list (0.0833)
having beautiful breasts (0.0833)
disabling your crazy friend (0.0833)
that wikipedia describes attending concerts as a "ritual" (0.0833)
soliciting a fourteen year old boy to pose for sexually explicit photographs (0.0833)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0833)
Bicoid Babe (0.0833)
cuddling (0.0833)
saying, "boners ahoy!" (0.0853)
Digimon (0.0870)
staying in college (0.0879)
sharing warm spiced cider with a loved one (0.0891)
Bicoid Babe (0.0909)
hugging a tree like a dirty hippie (0.0909)
garlic (0.0909)
making waffles (0.0909)
Squirtle (0.0909)
indulging your nerd side (0.0909)
suckling (0.0909)
NOT kneeling before Zod (0.0909)
Receiving from Jaylala (0.0909)
baking bread (0.0909)
nomming a hamburger (0.0909)
kicking it old school (0.0926)
moving out of your parent's house (0.0941)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0952)
treehouses (0.0952)
fun times involving sushi (0.0959)
learning another language (0.0962)
not having seen Muriel's Wedding (0.0968)
publicly mocking Swine Flu (0.0970)
dromiceiomimus (0.0976)
butts (0.0982)
rocking out (0.0988)
sitting on the floor in second grade (0.1000)
less than three (0.1000)
growing up in a nonchurchgoing family (0.1000)
drinking delicious lemonade (0.1014)
buying a Dinosaur Comics tshirt (0.1017)
sleeping naked (0.1026)
playing videogames while drunk (0.1048)
defending cream soda (0.1062)
the last time you drank (0.1071)
the very last thing you said (0.1071)
opening new cider (0.1077)
that stuff getting eaten is inherently funny (0.1111)
downloading music illegally (0.1111)
following that white rabbit (0.1111)
the death of Margaret Hilda Thatcher (0.1111)
spending all weekend naked (0.1111)
hugging a tree like a koala (0.1111)
kissing (0.1116)
becoming an atheist (0.1124)
getting into firefly (0.1126)
saying 'boners ahoy' (0.1127)
World War Two's ending in Allied victory (0.1129)
party party partying hard (0.1136)
eating raised bread (0.1154)
closing the door (0.1154)
boners (0.1156)
friendship (0.1167)
that rachel is back (0.1176)
the little wiggly things at the end of feet (0.1176)
spending an evening eating spicy cheetos, reading language log, and masturbating to nude photos of your ex from five years ago (0.1176)
making a little space for the cheese slices (0.1176)
drinking your first drink (0.1183)
putting punctuation in your comment (0.1184)
getting your hot cocoa on (0.1200)
skipping work to sit in the sun (0.1200)
accepting candy from strangers (0.1204)
starting over (0.1206)
thinking of rain (0.1212)
the color of blood outside the body when one has iron based blood (0.1212)
drinking a cold beer in the shower (0.1228)
breathing (0.1239)
hating family guy almost as soon as it was uncanceled (0.1250)
reading the book that changed everything (0.1250)
smoking weed (0.1266)
popping wheelies with the boys (0.1275)
winning (0.1287)
that groove is in the heart (0.1304)
watching Mystery Science Theatre all night (0.1304)
having sex at seventeen (0.1304)
vandalizing Wikipedia's chicken page that one time (0.1304)
ryan north (0.1308)
talking to strangers (0.1311)
not getting the chance to meet the Mets (0.1311)
free speech (0.1316)
voting (0.1324)
wondering what penguin would tase like (0.1333)
eating goat cheese (0.1333)
Zooey Deschanel looks like a sandblasted Lucy Lawless (0.1333)
not installing Safari Three on all your computers yet (0.1333)
flushing that gallon of rotten shrimp down the toilet (0.1333)
attempting to lucid dream (0.1333)
obama (0.1348)
qwantz (0.1356)
holding hands (0.1364)
kissing her (0.1364)
making out with that girl dressed as a French maid at that costume party (0.1364)
making mud soup as a kid (0.1364)
Voting for Barak Obama (0.1379)
being one of the very few people in your circle of friends to never really have the urge to smoke cigarettes (0.1389)
singing along (0.1395)
lasers (0.1395)
not wringing your parent's neck (0.1400)
not having kids (0.1408)
skipping the Harry Potter midnight release (0.1413)
ap classes (0.1413)
taking AP classes (0.1417)
not boning a donkey (0.1429)
polydactyl cats (0.1429)
being a rocker (0.1429)
paying for a whole seat but only using the edge (0.1429)
going hog wild (0.1429)
eating roast beef off of your own boobs (0.1429)
spooning Kento's boobs (0.1429)
that for every n in N there is a finite sequence a subscript k, of which every member is in Z and is nonnegative, such that the product for i from one to m, where m is the length of the sequence, of p subscript i to the power of a subscript i equals n (0.1429)
going to lunch (0.1429)
in jokes (0.1429)
What is this I don't even (0.1429)
having impure thoughts about a teenage Winona Rider (0.1429)
losing your virginity (0.1429)
having erotic fantasies about Bob Dylan (0.1429)
I don't know, always kind of liking narwhals yourself (0.1429)
kicking everyone's butt (0.1429)
dropping your first truth and beauty bomb (0.1429)
sexy spaceships (0.1429)
putting your jeans and socks in one load (0.1429)
growing long hair (0.1453)
living abroad (0.1477)
all those books you read (0.1481)
not being pretentious enough (0.1481)
passing yourself off as royalty (0.1500)
blowing raspberries (0.1500)
eating vaguely european (0.1500)
accepting a lower paying but much less stressfull job (0.1505)
burning that motherfucker down (0.1515)
going to the gym (0.1524)
that "bottom regrets" and "most voted regrets" are white while "add a new regret" "search regrets" "recent regrets" "top regrets" and "recent comments" are all in blue (0.1538)
physically assaulting that guy who can't even bother to tune in the easy listening station properly in his cubicle (0.1538)
sneaking around in a cardboard box, Metal Gear style (0.1538)
wearing two socks (0.1538)
The Middleman being cancelled (0.1538)
deep throating Stephen Fry (0.1538)
pie (0.1538)
keeping on trucking (0.1538)
drinking champagne out of a chimp anus (0.1538)
that you always liked Mike more than Joel (0.1538)
trying that exotic food (0.1544)
not kissing up to people, even if it's in your best interest to do so (0.1556)
memorising every Star Trek episode (0.1557)
keeping it real (0.1557)
loving Batman (0.1579)
getting drunk at a wedding (0.1579)
that "avril lavigne" in Canadia is a line of spring fresh canuck bidets (0.1579)
having seen Star Wars all the through probably over a hundred times (0.1579)
breaking the law (0.1583)
learning an instrument (0.1587)
gay (0.1587)
having a power level of over NINE THOUSAND (0.1591)
Being born (0.1595)
eating in a rad mood (0.1600)
that you tend to give money to buskers or not depending on their talent (0.1600)
spending an entire weekend in your pjs (0.1605)
being meat (0.1622)
eating bread (0.1622)
wikipedia (0.1622)
the indescribable beauty of simplicity (0.1622)
eating meat (0.1628)
playing Starfox Sixty Four (0.1647)
how many times you went back over the archive for Dinosaur comics (0.1648)
Pretending to be asleep to avoid talking (0.1649)
visiting this website (0.1656)
eating her out (0.1667)
pudding (0.1667)
wondering if so many ladies turn to writing and reading smut because they crave porn but get turned off by the way it's made (0.1667)
busting myths (0.1667)
not eating goats for a living (0.1667)
randomly meeting people who fill your heart with glee (0.1667)
always eating your skittles in prismatic order (0.1667)
christmas (0.1667)
eating left handed (0.1667)
Getting into Miles Davis (0.1667)
refusing to accept the modern sense of "tweet" into your vocabulary (0.1667)
having roast beef (0.1667)
being the one kid in your nerd clique who instantly hated Return of the Jedi with a passion (0.1667)
sweetness (0.1667)
questioning your sexuality (0.1667)
watching 'The Dark Knight' (0.1667)
cheese (0.1667)
reading the regret index (0.1680)
being able to say 'when I was your age, pluto was a planet' (0.1695)
playing in traffic (0.1696)
being British (0.1698)
having a onesome (0.1717)
hugging a tree (0.1719)
dancing naked ALL DAY LONG (0.1739)
listening to Wagner (0.1739)
neing a super freak super freak (0.1739)
wondering whether Kento, Document, Sarah, and Pseudonym have found the new regret index yet (0.1739)
not waxing your eyebrows in high school (0.1748)
that where we're going we don't need roads (0.1748)
preparing for the zombie apocalypse (0.1750)
a log cabin (0.1757)
staying up all night to watch the sun rise (0.1757)
not being one of those women who instantly fawn over babies (0.1765)
thinking of lettuce as just a delivery system for salad dressing (0.1765)
eating a huge nerd (0.1765)
putting on your robe and wizard hat (0.1765)
dessert (0.1765)
Garfield Minus Garfield (0.1765)
not meeting Emily Gray (0.1765)
planning for the zombie attack (0.1765)
getting a lick job from a trannie hooker in the dumpster behind Steak n Shake (0.1765)
loving lamp (0.1771)
having a crush on the Utahraptor (0.1773)
peanut butter (0.1778)
not switching to Geico (0.1786)
sexing her hardcore (0.1786)
breaking bones while snowboarding (0.1786)
that Venn diagramming is your favorite type of diagramming (0.1786)
painting the bedroom a color other than white or offwhite (0.1789)
still knowing the lyrics to eighties pop songs (0.1795)
bacon (0.1795)
that the Index is back, and the old users are back, and it is amazing nostalgic times for all (0.1795)
streaking (0.1818)
not going to freecreditreport dot com (0.1818)
hating swans (0.1818)
road trips (0.1818)
eating a huge marshmallow (0.1818)
hot bondage (0.1818)
brownies (0.1818)
wondering whether a centaur foal would suckle from the human breasts or the horse teats underneath (0.1818)
recognizing the beauty of mathematics and logic (0.1818)
dancing naked (0.1818)
drawing boobs (0.1818)
that you wonder if rachel would be in your klan or hoard or guild or whatever when the pokemon mmorpg comes out (0.1818)
simple english wikipedia (0.1818)
'buy one get one free' offers (0.1818)
that, in a way, David Carradine's death from autoerotic asphyxiation could properly be termed "a fatal stroke" (0.1818)
bringing up your distaste for Disney music (0.1818)
trying to convince someone you are their Tyler Durden (0.1818)
using the word "substitute" as a substitute for "replacement" (0.1818)
pronouncing "Intelligentsia" with a hard G (0.1818)
not really liking MMORPGs (0.1818)
sometimes squishing your own boobs just for the heck of it (0.1818)
spending the Fourth in someone else's country (0.1818)
camping (0.1818)
buying food for homeless people (0.1825)
telling your parents you're an atheist (0.1833)
not living in Corvallis, Oregon (0.1835)
yelling "in bed" at the end of fortune cookie fortunes (0.1837)
fry (0.1842)
drawing penises on the worksheet (0.1842)
having a huge internet crush on Kate Beaton (0.1852)
being an alligator (0.1852)
going to college (0.1852)
having a huge weiner (0.1852)
not knowing every ABBA song by heart, yet (0.1860)
iTunes somehow playing the same song around the same time every day despite being on shuffle (0.1875)
feeling that Pepe is the cutes BYOB corner pet (0.1875)
wanting to be under the sea, in an octopus's garden, in the shade (0.1875)
not joining the military (0.1875)
being real and fantastic (0.1875)
living in the city (0.1875)
not knowing more about Anonymous (0.1875)
wearing white after Labor Day (0.1875)
using the word "retarded" as a replacement for "stupid" (0.1875)
foreplay (0.1875)
watching Captain Planet (0.1875)
chocolate spread (0.1875)
eating a butterfinger (0.1875)
the metric system (0.1878)
giving that dorky, but really sweet guy a chance (0.1885)
dowloading that song (0.1887)
taking boat (0.1905)
being a meatatarian (0.1905)
eating a noun (0.1905)
waiting most of the morning for the time to roll around when you can go to lunch at the most awesome hot dog place ever (0.1905)
not actually being bitter or a nihilist (0.1905)
hooking up words and phrases and clauses (0.1905)
choosing cake instead of death (0.1905)
shooting Scott Temple (0.1905)
that the sea is deep and full of mystery (0.1905)
being the cat's meow (0.1905)
bondage (0.1923)
this picture (0.1923)
not watching the movie Pontypool (0.1923)
being afraid of Americans (0.1923)
telling your mother you don't want to have children (0.1923)
milk (0.1935)
being in a rad mood (0.1935)
earning a PhD instead of an MD (0.1935)
chrono trigger (0.1935)
clockwork (0.1935)
holding cats (0.1935)
learning new and interesting things about skin and blood (0.1935)
drawing a webcomic (0.1947)
reading pictures for sad children (0.1951)
saving up some money (0.1951)
not seeing Nicolas Cage after seeing Face Off (0.1951)
choosing adventure over security (0.1964)
signing up for Twitter (0.1983)
being the hottest item on the regret index (0.2000)
not smoking (0.2000)
jerking off into your roommate's shampoo bottle, not just once but every day for like two weeks (0.2000)
masturbating at a Jessica Alba movie (0.2000)
making out with that girl who turned out to still be in high school (0.2000)
how awesome broiling is (0.2000)
a glorious fart (0.2000)
buying the newer model (0.2000)
going on a bicycle tour (0.2000)
insisting on protection (0.2000)
delicious ice cream (0.2000)
someday wanting to own land, with fruit growing on that land (0.2000)
hooking up with ryan (0.2000)
busting through the heavens with your drill (0.2000)
losing your religion (0.2000)
not having played Kingdom Hearts yet (0.2000)
that larder is a pretty neat, word, a holdover whose anachronistic meaning specifically meant a COLD storage room, but post refrigeration came to mean simply a pantry, but it could also mean a supply of food, the thing itself (0.2000)
that crazy night in Pheonix (0.2000)
British English (0.2000)
revealing your nerdiness (0.2000)
ghosts (0.2000)
finally taking a chance and talking to him or her (0.2000)
liking michael showalter a lot (0.2000)
jumping in that lake (0.2022)
buying a Mac (0.2027)
not going to dartmouth (0.2034)
making love to your hand (0.2035)
extra sprinkles (0.2037)
Fictional Jimbo Wales (0.2041)
being bigger on the inside (0.2045)
donating to public radio (0.2045)
listening to the whole CD (0.2051)
hot snogging (0.2051)
giving a gift as a surprise (0.2055)
finding the key to the secret garden (0.2059)
lullabies (0.2059)
liking folk rock (0.2059)
mARRIAGE (0.2059)
swallowing (0.2069)
the Lord of the Rings (0.2079)
being mean to the neighbor's rude kid (0.2083)
changing your cell phone number (0.2083)
spending two hours on the phone with your grandmother (0.2083)
the resurrection of the regret index (0.2083)
experimenting with new and interesting sandwich fillings (0.2086)
thanksgiving (0.2086)
not going to prom (0.2088)
pancakes (0.2105)
wanting to take a girl under your arm (0.2105)
sleeping for thirteen hours (0.2105)
dinosaur wrestling (0.2105)
turning it up to eleven (0.2105)
eating cows (0.2105)
Dinosaur Comics' new layout (0.2105)
xkcd (0.2105)
being Witty (0.2105)
the Dromiceiomimus' improbable colouring (0.2105)
wearing a tshirt with a dinosaur on it to a dinosaur museum (0.2105)
magic (0.2105)
staying up all night to watch an eighteen year old paint her nails online (0.2115)
watching the Donald Duck cartoon "Die Fuhrer's Face" (0.2121)
donating (0.2121)
buying a motorcycle (0.2121)
playing chess (0.2121)
post it notes (0.2128)
wondering, if the death machine was made of organic technology, could it predict its own death (0.2143)
the invention of custard (0.2143)
facial hair (0.2143)
listening to music that no one else has heard of (0.2143)
air guitar (0.2143)
eating pizza (0.2143)
not killing every faggot I've ever seen in my entire life (0.2143)
disagreeing with things (0.2143)
going to market (0.2143)
being the lazer viking (0.2143)
being really cool (0.2143)
using words that are not really words (0.2143)
standing the test of time (0.2143)
wondering if we can get back up to forty thousand regrets in a year's time (0.2143)
going to university (0.2143)
lying on a futon (0.2143)
Monty Python (0.2143)
that consomme is broth with will (0.2143)
listening to Beethoven (0.2143)
making your time (0.2143)
Jack Kerouac (0.2143)
running with scissors (0.2151)
washing your pet (0.2157)
going to the beach alone (0.2157)
using hugs, not drugs (0.2157)
being American (0.2160)
knowing why the caged bird sings (0.2162)
having eaten dinner (0.2162)
telling your brother he was adopted (0.2174)
giggling over a heart's warm cockles (0.2174)
taking care of knives (0.2174)
punching that baby, despite it's rude behavior (0.2174)
watching the sunrise (0.2174)
not eating Pizza Hut pizza (0.2174)
ephemera (0.2174)
purposely deceiving someone who never listens to what you have to say (0.2182)
the death of Clippy (0.2200)
missing the NBA playoffs to watch the new episode of 'Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern' (0.2203)
almost always using the British spellings for things, even though you are an American and your spell check always tells you it's wrong (0.2206)
shooting a man in Reno just to watch him die (0.2211)
major tom (0.2222)
feeding the ducks (0.2222)
looking at pictures of adorable puppies (0.2222)
being the bee's knees (0.2222)
fighting the Nausican (0.2222)
playing dress up (0.2222)
Loosing you religion or faith (0.2222)
PIN numbers (0.2222)
volunteering (0.2222)
wondering what the significance of the qwantz dot com domain name is (0.2222)
explaining to someone what the Regret Index is (0.2222)
getting a tattoo (0.2222)
painting your fingernails lime green (0.2222)
being Anonymous (0.2222)
what you did last Friday night (0.2222)
tiger's belly (0.2222)
being too awesome (0.2222)
sending the President into exile (0.2222)
good times (0.2222)
stealing the enterprise (0.2241)
crying during the first ten minutes of the new Star Trek movie (0.2241)
singing Bohemian Rhapsody at the top of your lungs (0.2245)
ever reading that first comic strip on the Web (0.2245)
xylophones (0.2250)
dancing all crazy (0.2250)
EXISTING (0.2254)
getting over your ex so quickly (0.2258)
spreading your legs (0.2258)
cut and pasting a webcomic (0.2273)
staying on the phone all night (0.2273)
cooking bacon (0.2273)
having a name that is fifty percent vowels (0.2273)
quitting even though the job was OK, but just OK (0.2273)
writing slashfiction about webcomic authors (0.2286)
a lifetime dedicated to public displays of air guitar (0.2286)
what happened in vegas (0.2286)
not settling down when all your friends did (0.2286)
wondering if there's a way to extract all of these autofill regrets into a text file for saving and possibly choosing the better ones (0.2286)
switching parties (0.2292)
sticking with your major (0.2292)
optical illusions (0.2292)
the internet (0.2293)
horseshoe crabs (0.2308)
actually finding pigeons more cute than vermin like (0.2308)
having a cute little white butt (0.2308)
having an adolescent crush on Christopher Walken (0.2308)
having an affair with the flirty executive assistant (0.2308)
playing god (0.2308)
deep fat frying a twinkie (0.2308)
reading every single Dinosaur Comic from beginning to end in a single sitting (0.2308)
vaguely effeminate dancing frogs (0.2308)
running away from indie cred, even though you listen to some of the music (0.2308)
filling your thesis with references to monkeys (0.2308)
correcting your friends everytime they misspell Dromiceiomimus (0.2308)
going to Spain (0.2308)
being a pantyaire, like a millionaire but with panties instead of money (0.2308)
stories about elves and unicorns (0.2308)
a French guy who looks like Janice Dickinson wearing a strap on under a fancy ball gown, just to piss off his rich bitch girlfriend and her annoying family (0.2308)
preferring women with body hair over women who shave (0.2308)
birth control (0.2308)
that dreaming is free (0.2308)
the general awesomeness of blacklights (0.2308)
not knowing who Richard Dawkins is (0.2308)
just wanting a sign (0.2308)
dandelion wine (0.2308)
leaving a legacy (0.2308)
puttin' on the ritz (0.2308)
being your mother's child (0.2308)
that you like pie quite a bit (0.2308)
flipping off everyone you hated from high school (0.2308)
extra cheese (0.2308)
buying a chocolate bar without checking the label first, only to find it had peanuts in it (0.2320)
spending a whole bunch of time reading random articles on wikipedia (0.2326)
chewing bubblegum (0.2326)
that your delicious cheeseburger was made from a cow whose cause of death was predicted by an infallible machine (0.2326)
learning all the elements in the periodic table in order (0.2328)
getting a credit card (0.2329)
your haircut (0.2333)
getting out of bed this morning (0.2333)
Grad school (0.2336)
log cabin (0.2340)
spending an entire day listening to the same song on repeat (0.2348)
deep frying boring healthy food (0.2353)
writing the letter "x" backwards and upsidedown (0.2353)
thinking that dinosaur might be good to eat, depending on the species, but wondering if the size of the animal would effect the texture of the meat or something like that (0.2353)
comitting massive regret vote fraud (0.2353)
paying for something with fifteen dollars in quarters (0.2353)
retiring early (0.2353)
going to church (0.2353)
tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (0.2353)
feeling closer to people in this world of regret (0.2353)
tapping her mana (0.2353)
eating food that are high in potastium (0.2353)
growing a handlebar moustache (0.2353)
dancing with the devil in the pale moon light (0.2353)
eating babies (0.2353)
irony (0.2368)
only that you have but one life to give for your country (0.2373)
getting hooked on Harry Potter or Twilight (0.2375)
adding this to StumbleUpon (0.2381)
being the latest in nerd technology (0.2381)
reading, that shit is crazy (0.2381)
ice cream (0.2381)
having sexy intestines (0.2381)
shit son, I don't know (0.2381)
making fun of people who instigate fights in YouTube's comments section (0.2381)
doing it for the lulz (0.2386)
missing Efterklang at the Dublin Docklands (0.2400)
impersonating that person (0.2400)
following Stephen Fry on Twitter (0.2400)
helvetica (0.2400)
falling in love (0.2400)
losing your religion, like in that one song (0.2400)
inventing a maneuver (0.2400)
broken broccoli (0.2400)
going to an Ivy League school (0.2400)
Paris (0.2400)
penis (0.2407)
orthodontics (0.2407)
using flesh for digestive energy (0.2411)
still knowing the lyrics to nineties pop songs (0.2414)
chocolate (0.2414)
not being on fire (0.2418)
my high GPA in high school (0.2418)
nothing (0.2421)
love (0.2424)
going through a Bob Marley phase in college, like EVERYONE else (0.2424)
pretending you're a woman to get into nursing school (0.2424)
pictures for sad children (0.2432)
asking her out (0.2435)
the english alphabet (0.2436)
turning up at Ryan's door covered in mustard (0.2449)
studying linguistics (0.2453)
Skipping the Fiance's family Easter Dinner to play xbox and go to a concert (0.2456)
giving up eating mammals (0.2460)
rereading all the harry potter books (0.2462)
buying a Wii (0.2471)
dating someone much younger (0.2474)
breaking up with my first love (0.2482)
being born during the hot war (0.2500)
wondering what kind of girl would be impressed with somebody smoking, it doesn't seem that difficult to do (0.2500)
going the extra mile (0.2500)
thinking someone was hot just because they were good at maths (0.2500)
lovin' dem pizza rolls (0.2500)
the Pythagorean theorem (0.2500)
that you never had a chance to tell Farty McCrablice that YOU LOVE HIM (0.2500)
a clandestine meating (0.2500)
not giving David Gwilliam kisses before he got married (0.2500)
line dancing while drunk (0.2500)
being a huge nerd (0.2500)
underboob (0.2500)
books (0.2500)
getting a liberal arts education (0.2500)
never dealing drugs (0.2500)
eating a minimalist (0.2500)
eating a tasty salad (0.2500)
life being so tasty (0.2500)
the first time you got drunk (0.2500)
escaping out the back (0.2500)
being The One (0.2500)
ira glass vs philip glass in "glass warfare" (0.2500)
using my mom's deodorant (0.2500)
that English is your fourth language and you speak it better than your first but not your second (0.2500)
meeting a possum (0.2500)
yogurt's laxative properties (0.2500)
girls with full lips and wide hips (0.2500)
your sudden urge to make brownies (0.2500)
answering the telephone in a foreign language (0.2500)
having low pop culture IQ (0.2500)
this place smelling like brownies all of the sudden (0.2500)
smoking pot (0.2500)
your very existence (0.2500)
Ryan getting the Regret Index back up (0.2500)
tickling her THERE (0.2500)
a b a a b a b b b a b a a a a b b a b a b a a b b a a b b b a a b b a b b b a b b a b a a a b b b b b a a b b b a a a b a b a b a b a b b a b a a b b a b b a a a a b a b a b a a b b a b b a b a b b b a a b b a a b b a b b a b b b a a a b a b a b a b b a a (0.2500)
not having balls (0.2500)
making fun of fat swans (0.2500)
girls, ewwwwww (0.2500)
lesbians (0.2500)
becoming vegetarian or vegan (0.2500)
sexual congress (0.2500)
being crazy and or retarded (0.2500)
having sex with your boss' underage daughter (0.2500)
all of the weird things you are a fan of (0.2500)
knowing she was gay and still dating her (0.2500)
falling in love with the majesty of colors (0.2500)
being necessarily clever (0.2500)
trolling the UK government petition site with stupid petitions you know would be rejected (0.2500)
wondering what goes through their little kitty brains (0.2500)
licking out a feminist (0.2500)
hugging a koala (0.2500)
ever saying "no fat chicks" (0.2500)
speaking in spoonerisms (0.2500)
considering eating two dollars and fifty cents worth of raspberries in one sitting (0.2500)
fluffy cats (0.2500)
correcting people on their improper use of the subjunctive (0.2500)
deliberately misunderstanding offensive slang by taking it literally, ie assume when someone says 'faggot' that they refer to a bundle of sticks or twigs (0.2500)
losing yourself and dreaming of world that lie between her fingers (0.2500)
that aloe plants are awesome (0.2500)
being scared of Kefka (0.2500)
getting divorced (0.2500)
making pies (0.2500)
that Japanese people LOVE coelacanths (0.2500)
wearing hipster glasses (0.2527)
socializing instead of playing video games (0.2527)
tweed jackets with leather elbow patches (0.2535)
eating mexican food (0.2540)
dyeing your hair (0.2545)
trying something new (0.2547)
not googling The Underfold (0.2554)
chromatic scales (0.2558)
being (0.2558)
not listening to Billy Zane (0.2564)
leaving the farm (0.2564)
wishing you could give yourself a blowie (0.2564)
tang (0.2564)
not trying alcohol sooner (0.2564)
sexy times with a friend (0.2570)
anonymity (0.2571)
not knowing what the big deal with Twitter is (0.2571)
The Princess Bride (0.2581)
quoting that xkcd comic (0.2581)
going back for seconds on dessert (0.2582)
eating lunch yesterday (0.2593)
being a Shakespeare nerd (0.2593)
painting your fingernails black (0.2593)
white text on a dark background (0.2593)
takin it to the streets (0.2609)
eating that piece of chocolate (0.2609)
tapirs (0.2609)
eating out a feminist (0.2609)
eating all the royalty (0.2609)
throwing your underwear onto the stage (0.2609)
bursting out into evil laughter in a crowded or public place (0.2609)
not sleeping with that tranvestite (0.2609)
making love above the pub (0.2609)
ATM machines (0.2609)
having known love (0.2619)
starting that fire (0.2619)
learning lisp (0.2619)
cooking hamburgers on my engine block (0.2632)
polygamy (0.2632)
giving your best when you know it won't be enough (0.2632)
eating that cookie out of the trash (0.2632)
raspberries, om nom nom (0.2632)
going commando (0.2632)
wondering what kind of feelings different animals feel (0.2632)
sexuality (0.2632)
writing a novel (0.2632)
being there for her when she needed you (0.2632)
being winsome (0.2632)
taking comfort in the regret index in any way whatsoever (0.2632)
wanting gummi bears and or banana chips right now (0.2632)
being vaguely european (0.2632)
eating tofu (0.2634)
that shorts are comfy and easy to wear (0.2647)
insisting on precision (0.2656)
responding with Sassy Molassy (0.2658)
popping the zits on your ass (0.2667)
not having tiny brown birds live behind your air conditioner (0.2667)
letting her sit in the front seat (0.2667)
crowdsurfing (0.2667)
alligators in the sewer (0.2667)
slowly replacing every part of your body with machinery (0.2667)
Dresden Codak (0.2667)
spooning Jewel's boobs (0.2667)
taking the last brownie (0.2667)
listening to music at a much higher or lower volume than what the artist intended (0.2667)
Peeing in someone's drink (0.2667)
unpacking my adjectives (0.2667)
coconut bras (0.2667)
eating food that fell on the ground (0.2667)
buying one of each in EVERY COLOUR (0.2667)
that all you know about Final Fantasy, you learned from a friend who really liked it when you were teenagers (0.2667)
ordering from Amazon marketplace (0.2667)
living in a country that doesn't have bagged milk (0.2667)
cleaning out your bowels through the act of pooping (0.2667)
pokemon (0.2673)
doing a favour that I knew would not be repayed (0.2674)
listining to something when you know it'll make you cry (0.2692)
that now that the Regret Index is back, you can go back to ignoring your Facebook, Twitter, Livejournal, Tegaki, and Deviantart (0.2692)
airing out your nughty bits (0.2692)
eating a vegan (0.2692)
Wagner (0.2692)
going to graduate school (0.2697)
your First Time (0.2698)
losing your virginity when you did (0.2703)
switching majors (0.2703)
a tiny woman (0.2703)
eating pistachio nuts (0.2708)
everything (0.2708)
putting these dumb questions on here (0.2716)
brutal legend (0.2727)
eating skinless breasts (0.2727)
challenging someone to a duel via a glove to the face (0.2727)
the simpsons (0.2727)
hasbro (0.2727)
going to the fancy dress party as Batman, knowing full well that the theme had no conceivable connection to Batman (0.2727)
making friends with a cat named Badger (0.2727)
eating bacon made from pigs that had swine flu (0.2727)
boneless skinless chicken breasts (0.2727)
a giant cup of hot chocolate, complete with little marshmellows and cream (0.2727)
not eating my shorts (0.2727)
waking up late in the afternoon (0.2727)
pushing it well (0.2727)
not memorising every Star Trek episode (0.2727)
drinking from the tap (0.2727)
loving Canada (0.2727)
being childfree (0.2727)
joining community theater (0.2727)
hide and seek (0.2727)
ripping off penis jokes (0.2727)
Werther's Originals (0.2727)
making references to poetry (0.2727)
agreeing to casual sex with that hot friend who looks like that one movie star (0.2727)
Taking an art degree (0.2727)
going wee wee wee all the way home (0.2727)
OGC Man (0.2727)
M C Escher (0.2727)
opening a nice, refreshing Tab (0.2727)
tagging the Wikipedia article on irony as "contradicts itself" (0.2727)
going out to the woods today (0.2727)
taking up the ukulele (0.2727)
being the king of all cosmos (0.2727)
loving (0.2727)
wondering where all these regretters came from (0.2727)
eating something you found on the ground or floor (0.2727)
having Clue in your list of Top Ten Favorite Movies of All Time (0.2727)
dating (0.2727)
selling your nintendo wii (0.2727)
spooning (0.2727)
changing your name (0.2727)
floating in a most peculiar way (0.2727)
gyrating your leatherwrapped genitals in the faces of those Japanese schoolchildren (0.2727)
theamazingregretindexing (0.2727)
banjo dueling (0.2727)
watching Borat (0.2734)
the final countdown (0.2745)
sending emails using your friends emails when he or she leaves themselves logged in and are not looking (0.2745)
having a winsome onesome (0.2750)
living with your mother (0.2750)
listening to a favorite song on repeat for hours (0.2759)
for some reason having a bias against nicotine (0.2759)
the existence of the interrobang! (0.2759)
eating macademia nuts (0.2759)
flames (0.2759)
coming on to the regret index (0.2759)
fasting (0.2759)
opening the windows (0.2759)
that your livingroom is full of dancers (0.2759)
the venture brothers (0.2759)
coming to this site (0.2763)
super fat hippos (0.2766)
having that threesome (0.2766)
using this site to admit your regrets (0.2766)
getting (0.2768)
asking them out (0.2770)
wondering why rachel has returned to commenting without using her name (0.2778)
liking fat thighs you can not lie (0.2778)
eating that last cookie (0.2778)
asking them to wait for you (0.2778)
being Ryan (0.2778)
walruses (0.2778)
eating boxed triceratops (0.2778)
being a socialist (0.2778)
the moon (0.2778)
wearing that outfit at the same time she did (0.2778)
your wares (0.2778)
reading through the entire dinosaur comics archive and then talking like Ryan for the next month (0.2791)
memorizing Monty Python and the Holy Grail (0.2791)
not knowing any ABBA songs by Heart (0.2791)
liking songs that seem innocent on first listening, but end up being about serial killers or something like that (0.2800)
going back in time to punch nazis in da face (0.2800)
not owning a single pair of tube socks (0.2800)
taking the boat (0.2800)
coming out (0.2800)
being well endowed (0.2800)
that you were only referring to the subjects of ABBA's music primarily seeming to come from a feminine point of view, but yeah, you don't mind referring to longhaired blonde Swedish dudes as "chicks" (0.2800)
not having an abortion (0.2800)
being well envoweled (0.2800)
spending the entire night going through the archives of that webcomic (0.2804)
masturbating (0.2813)
zombies ate my neighbors (0.2813)
telling him you had feelings for him even though you really didn't know whether he'd reciprocate (0.2813)
puppy dawgs (0.2813)
wanting to discover life with someone (0.2813)
boats (0.2813)
referring to water as hydrogen hydroxide, as a means to both achieve maximal accuracy from the perspective of how the atoms are actually connected, and freaking people out (0.2813)
doing acid (0.2813)
your gay experience (0.2817)
missing the Butthole Surfers concert (0.2821)
selling myself to science (0.2821)
the successful launch of Sputnik I (0.2826)
eating too much at Thanksgiving (0.2836)
cooking yourself a lavish meal and not sharing it with anyone (0.2847)
your double agency (0.2857)
the death of a disco dancer (0.2857)
using drugs (0.2857)
throwing meat at vegans (0.2857)
taking an expectorant (0.2857)
lying about how spicy it was (0.2857)
every sexual experience you've ever had (0.2857)
not having a penis (0.2857)
vowels (0.2857)
pooping on a dog (0.2857)
globalisation (0.2857)
your fingertips tasting like garlic (0.2857)
having your memories backed up on a thumb drive (0.2857)
being honest (0.2857)
wanting to ride your bicycle, wanting to ride it when you like (0.2857)
screaming I LOVE YOU from the top of your lungs (0.2857)
reproducing via meiosis (0.2857)
taking the Amtrak (0.2857)
not telling your parents (0.2857)
having a detachable penis (0.2857)
eating cheese just for the sake of eating cheese (0.2857)
winter (0.2857)
following a dream even though it didn't work out (0.2857)
eating snakes (0.2857)
being born after Freddy Mercury died (0.2857)
that your whole family is made of meat (0.2857)
only listening to good music (0.2857)
the ventures (0.2857)
tieing your best friend up (0.2857)
never doing bad things (0.2857)
kissing him (0.2864)
deciding you are too cool to go to the prom (0.2867)
getting mushrooms on your pizza (0.2872)
telling the truth, even though it hurt him (0.2875)
secretly wanting internet fame (0.2877)
intentionally spreading Swine Flu (0.2879)
rubbing my face in a tiger's belly (0.2889)
thinking that the dude in the header of this website is kinda cute (0.2895)
playing Spyro (0.2895)
private school (0.2895)
learning so many digits of pi (0.2895)
going POOP (0.2895)
watching House (0.2897)
mocha (0.2903)
cathedrals (0.2917)
gazing (0.2917)
Philip Fry's eleventh year of living in the future (0.2917)
The Ten Second Rule (0.2917)
not getting circumcised (0.2917)
not sleeping with him (0.2917)
loving chocolate so damn much (0.2917)
that Weezing is a member of both the Team Rocket Poison Type binary with Arbok, and the Cinnabar Mansion Pollution binary with Muk (0.2917)
flirting with somebody other than your significant other (0.2924)
picking Charmander (0.2927)
tackling her (0.2927)
sleeping with your best friend (0.2931)
taking the red pill (0.2933)
wondering how one gets a job as a taxidermist and bone cleaner (0.2941)
taking it all off (0.2941)
not voting for the President (0.2941)
rioting with the frenzied mob (0.2941)
that someone keeps looking at my submitted regrets and combining them to form hilarious new ones (0.2941)
your internet name lasting this long (0.2941)
using ghee as an intimate lubricant (0.2941)
driving all day in order to pick up your brother, who is coming home for the summer (0.2941)
the flowers that bloom in the spring (0.2941)
only wanting to see Wolverine because of the hot, hairy Liev Schreiber (0.2941)
not giving change to what you thought was a homeless guy but was just some dude in need of a shower (0.2941)
accidentally setting my balls on fire with a barbecue lighter (0.2941)
using only one pokemon (0.2941)
being a child once (0.2941)
adding a new regret (0.2941)
coming from the land of the ice and snow, from the midnight sun where the hot springs flow (0.2941)
going to a tiny college (0.2941)
giving that bum some money (0.2947)
waking up this morning (0.2954)
laughing because you suddenly remembered something hilarious, then realizing strangers are looking at you (0.2960)
hanging out with strangers on public transit (0.2960)
living drug free (0.2963)
chewing on things (0.2963)
wondering if anyone has the old regret list (0.2963)
pressing that big button (0.2963)
geometry (0.2963)
cutting off your long hair (0.2963)
forgetting sarah marshall (0.2963)
homographic homophonic autantonyms (0.2973)
cleaning up after yourself (0.3000)
believing in god (0.3000)
not thinking xkcd should get as much grief as it does (0.3000)
looking through all the old regrets you made, using the cache (0.3000)
sex with your best friend (0.3000)
stuffing that lawyer in the fridge (0.3000)
your twisted desires (0.3000)
can mine for fish (0.3000)
that there is no such thing as an original sin (0.3000)
stealing Tucksworth's hamburger (0.3000)
Batman (0.3000)
the bird being a word (0.3000)
eating a child once (0.3000)
throwing your hands up in the air, waving them around like you just don't care (0.3000)
living on the edge (0.3000)
Friends (0.3000)
that everybody's footloose (0.3000)
white type on a black background (0.3010)
kissing that boy in Ithaca (0.3019)
leaving (0.3021)
liking shorts (0.3023)
telling people you listen to indie music (0.3028)

most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12561/0.9789)
Kento (2760/0.9993)
turtles (2608/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2431/0.0004)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2336/0.5076)
[ show more ]

most discussed regrets

tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (357)
turtles (291)
your boobs buying food on ebay (109)
the death of Sylvia Browne (70)
not getting circumcised (63)
[ show more ]