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recent regrets

United States v Article Consisting of Fifty Thousand Cardboard Boxes More or Less, Each Containing One Pair of Clacker Balls
I don't remember Minnie having tits that nice
Pups save cartoon
Children Learning video
nice video for kids
Cartoon for children
Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes Mickey Mouse Prank! Minnie Mouse Rescue Mickey Mouse From Demon
putting this apple on your head
Rice Capital of America
a very long standing and ill founded prejudice against the employment of women as agents
smallchested busted butt nuns
impregnating whores
naming your band "Wangspau Banday"
impinging whoms
whingeing Poms
spewing in cases with Kevin Spacey
drop by Kento's nips for some free bleach
I'm back in Kodiak for a month
wondering if you're going through a lot of cocaine lately because you're always around
[ show all 135269 regrets ]

recent comments

(1) naming your band "Wangs"
(1) shellchested busted nut buns
(1) wondering if there is a median point where the curves of insane through too much sex and insane through too much money intersect, and whether it is reached sooner or later than in the natural state when money is exchanged for sex
(2) making a old woman cry by calling her an ugly mouse, i'm looking at you, old german lady with alzheimer's
(1) that alex could be short for either alexander or alexandra, thus not clearing up the question of whether sa is female or male at ALL
(2) Virgin vs Chad memes
(1) Kids, consuming wieners with ease
(3) if you hard, then you hard
(1) knowing the date you last ate jalapenos
(3) I shall join you in those impure thoughts
[ show more ]

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top regrets

the goddamn deliberately disabled modems Earthlink sent out to customers in the early aughts, cannot enable DHCP without "paying" extra, and using PPoE plus a router with DHCP disables streaming video, FU Earthlink (1.0000)
kind of loving Gene Hunt, that magnificent bastard (1.0000)
your dyslexia flaring up (1.0000)
regrets about pony blowing (1.0000)
keeping Harry Mason alive through a whole game, only to have him go and get killed off in another game without you being able to do anything about it (1.0000)
[ show more ]

bottom regrets

not eating out Kento (0.0000)
having sex with a girl who looked a lot like Christina Ricci (0.0000)
telling that girl in second grade who insisted that you were "the boss of her" to show you her vagina (0.0000)
stabbing Isabella Rossellini and ejaculating in the wound (0.0000)
tits (0.0000)
shaving Jewel's bush, meow (0.0000)
The Curious Cans of Benjamin Buttocks (0.0000)
slamming your dick in the car door (0.0000)
licking Danish remoulade off of Chris Lydon's erect penis (0.0000)
banging a Tim Burton heroine (0.0000)
Owen and Mzee (0.0000)
having impure thoughts about a teenage Kimmie Gibbler (0.0000)
pussy (0.0000)
stealing that girl's bra from the communal laundry room (0.0000)
not being Kento (0.0000)
teabagging Raymond Burr (0.0000)
masturbating with your cut off hand (0.0000)
arresting a king in his own palace (0.0000)
humping Jewel's bust (0.0000)
brunettes (0.0000)
cornholing Willie Mays (0.0000)
bellowing DARKNESS MY OLD FRIEND (0.0000)
doing Harambe jokes eighteen months later (0.0000)
killing the California girls (0.0000)
using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
sucking her left one until she had a breastgasm (0.0000)
telling the Philippines authorities that Kento is a drug mule (0.0000)
smashing a birdhouse with your flaccid dick (0.0000)
having Gordon Ramsay voice an orangutan who does nothing but masturbate and defecate (0.0000)
holding your boobs when you run down the stairs (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
twats (0.0000)
turtles (0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (0.0004)
breasts (0.0135)
regret index greatest tits, Kento (0.0153)
buying multiple copies of the book "To Be or Not to Be" by the incredibly handsome New York Times bestselling author Ryan North (0.0161)
fisting Go Ikeda (0.0182)
slamming your dick in Jewel's boobs (0.0185)
saying no when you should have said yes (0.0217)
having a lesbian crush on Alex Dainis (0.0233)
dongs (0.0297)
staring at Bicoid Babe's ass seriously (0.0310)
Twin Long Rods #Two (0.0345)
asian racks (0.0357)
fisting Kevin Bacon at home (0.0370)
hating reality TV shows (0.0385)
sexy makeouts (0.0400)
going to the Sweatiest Ass in the World world premiere with Kento (0.0408)
being awesome (0.0410)
going slightly out of your way to step on that crunchy looking leaf (0.0433)
consistent pubic lice (0.0455)
dinosaurs (0.0466)
being the real deal (0.0526)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0541)
learning to play the xylophone (0.0543)
playing Dungeons & Dragons with Tim Duncan (0.0556)
how weird The Regret Index becomes at night (0.0556)
Allison Iraheta being voted off American Idol (0.0556)
being a nerd (0.0580)
drinking delicious lemonade and popping wheelies (0.0588)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0606)
managing to resist the perverse curiosity to see TwoGirlsOneCup, so far (0.0625)
demanding proof (0.0625)
building a castle out of the junk in a junkyard (0.0625)
this video (0.0667)
sleeping with that slim ugly huge breasted double D cup bucktoothed seventeen year old national merit scolar bikini model cellist goth, and by the way, screw you MB (0.0714)
really not regretting the number one four two eight at all (0.0714)
having to wear glasses (0.0714)
that Jewel has huge boobs, seriously (0.0714)
your love of eighties action movies (0.0727)
boobs (0.0746)
discovering webcomics (0.0769)
choosing Squirtle (0.0769)
boobs, vaginas, asses, and such (0.0769)
not wearing panties (0.0769)
getting FOUR fish hooks stuck in your scrotum (0.0769)
sprinking chocolate chips on your beloved's breasts as you knead them (0.0769)
playing it loud (0.0769)
futurama (0.0769)
playing Dungeons & Dragons with Tim Duncan (0.0769)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0811)
making a fort in your living room out of couch cushions (0.0816)
defending the bullied kid (0.0820)
having beautiful breasts (0.0833)
soliciting a fourteen year old boy to pose for sexually explicit photographs (0.0833)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0833)
that wikipedia describes attending concerts as a "ritual" (0.0833)
dinosaur comics (0.0833)
disabling your crazy friend (0.0833)
that walruses, goats, and swans represent the Leviathan, Behemoth, and Ziz, respectively, of the regret index (0.0833)
not supporting the President (0.0833)
cuddling (0.0833)
"Allison Iraheta being voted off American Idol" being voted off the bottom regrets list (0.0833)
Bicoid Babe (0.0833)
saying, "boners ahoy!" (0.0853)
Digimon (0.0870)
staying in college (0.0879)
sharing warm spiced cider with a loved one (0.0891)
NOT kneeling before Zod (0.0909)
indulging your nerd side (0.0909)
Receiving from Jaylala (0.0909)
suckling (0.0909)
Bicoid Babe (0.0909)
garlic (0.0909)
making waffles (0.0909)
Squirtle (0.0909)
nomming a hamburger (0.0909)
hugging a tree like a dirty hippie (0.0909)
baking bread (0.0909)
kicking it old school (0.0926)
moving out of your parent's house (0.0941)
treehouses (0.0952)
all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy (0.0952)
fun times involving sushi (0.0959)
learning another language (0.0962)
not having seen Muriel's Wedding (0.0968)
publicly mocking Swine Flu (0.0970)
dromiceiomimus (0.0976)
butts (0.0982)
rocking out (0.0988)
less than three (0.1000)
breastfeeding (0.1000)
sitting on the floor in second grade (0.1000)
growing up in a nonchurchgoing family (0.1000)
drinking delicious lemonade (0.1014)
buying a Dinosaur Comics tshirt (0.1017)
sleeping naked (0.1026)
playing videogames while drunk (0.1048)
defending cream soda (0.1062)
the last time you drank (0.1071)
the very last thing you said (0.1071)
opening new cider (0.1077)
downloading music illegally (0.1111)
following that white rabbit (0.1111)
the death of Margaret Hilda Thatcher (0.1111)
spending all weekend naked (0.1111)
that stuff getting eaten is inherently funny (0.1111)
hugging a tree like a koala (0.1111)
kissing (0.1116)
becoming an atheist (0.1124)
getting into firefly (0.1126)
saying 'boners ahoy' (0.1127)
World War Two's ending in Allied victory (0.1129)
party party partying hard (0.1136)
closing the door (0.1154)
eating raised bread (0.1154)
boners (0.1156)
friendship (0.1167)
the little wiggly things at the end of feet (0.1176)
making a little space for the cheese slices (0.1176)
that rachel is back (0.1176)
spending an evening eating spicy cheetos, reading language log, and masturbating to nude photos of your ex from five years ago (0.1176)
drinking your first drink (0.1183)
putting punctuation in your comment (0.1184)
getting your hot cocoa on (0.1200)
skipping work to sit in the sun (0.1200)
accepting candy from strangers (0.1204)
starting over (0.1206)
the color of blood outside the body when one has iron based blood (0.1212)
thinking of rain (0.1212)
drinking a cold beer in the shower (0.1228)
breathing (0.1239)
hating family guy almost as soon as it was uncanceled (0.1250)
reading the book that changed everything (0.1250)
smoking weed (0.1266)
popping wheelies with the boys (0.1275)
winning (0.1287)
vandalizing Wikipedia's chicken page that one time (0.1304)
that groove is in the heart (0.1304)
watching Mystery Science Theatre all night (0.1304)
having sex at seventeen (0.1304)
ryan north (0.1308)
talking to strangers (0.1311)
not getting the chance to meet the Mets (0.1311)
free speech (0.1316)
voting (0.1324)
wondering what penguin would tase like (0.1333)
flushing that gallon of rotten shrimp down the toilet (0.1333)
attempting to lucid dream (0.1333)
not installing Safari Three on all your computers yet (0.1333)
Zooey Deschanel looks like a sandblasted Lucy Lawless (0.1333)
obama (0.1348)
qwantz (0.1356)
holding hands (0.1364)
making out with that girl dressed as a French maid at that costume party (0.1364)
kissing her (0.1364)
making mud soup as a kid (0.1364)
Voting for Barak Obama (0.1379)
being one of the very few people in your circle of friends to never really have the urge to smoke cigarettes (0.1389)
lasers (0.1395)
singing along (0.1395)
not wringing your parent's neck (0.1400)
not having kids (0.1408)
skipping the Harry Potter midnight release (0.1413)
ap classes (0.1413)
taking AP classes (0.1417)
having erotic fantasies about Bob Dylan (0.1429)
having impure thoughts about a teenage Winona Rider (0.1429)
being a rocker (0.1429)
I don't know, always kind of liking narwhals yourself (0.1429)
that for every n in N there is a finite sequence a subscript k, of which every member is in Z and is nonnegative, such that the product for i from one to m, where m is the length of the sequence, of p subscript i to the power of a subscript i equals n (0.1429)
eating roast beef off of your own boobs (0.1429)
kicking everyone's butt (0.1429)
polydactyl cats (0.1429)
going to lunch (0.1429)
going hog wild (0.1429)
in jokes (0.1429)
sexy spaceships (0.1429)
not boning a donkey (0.1429)
What is this I don't even (0.1429)
paying for a whole seat but only using the edge (0.1429)
dropping your first truth and beauty bomb (0.1429)
spooning Kento's boobs (0.1429)
putting your jeans and socks in one load (0.1429)
growing long hair (0.1453)
living abroad (0.1477)
not being pretentious enough (0.1481)
all those books you read (0.1481)
blowing raspberries (0.1500)
passing yourself off as royalty (0.1500)
eating vaguely european (0.1500)
accepting a lower paying but much less stressfull job (0.1505)
burning that motherfucker down (0.1515)
going to the gym (0.1524)
sneaking around in a cardboard box, Metal Gear style (0.1538)
pie (0.1538)
physically assaulting that guy who can't even bother to tune in the easy listening station properly in his cubicle (0.1538)
The Middleman being cancelled (0.1538)
that you always liked Mike more than Joel (0.1538)
keeping on trucking (0.1538)
that "bottom regrets" and "most voted regrets" are white while "add a new regret" "search regrets" "recent regrets" "top regrets" and "recent comments" are all in blue (0.1538)
deep throating Stephen Fry (0.1538)
drinking champagne out of a chimp anus (0.1538)
wearing two socks (0.1538)
trying that exotic food (0.1544)
not kissing up to people, even if it's in your best interest to do so (0.1556)
memorising every Star Trek episode (0.1557)
keeping it real (0.1557)
getting drunk at a wedding (0.1579)
that "avril lavigne" in Canadia is a line of spring fresh canuck bidets (0.1579)
being the one kid in your nerd clique who instantly hated Return of the Jedi with a passion (0.1579)
loving Batman (0.1579)
having seen Star Wars all the through probably over a hundred times (0.1579)
breaking the law (0.1583)
learning an instrument (0.1587)
gay (0.1587)
having a power level of over NINE THOUSAND (0.1591)
Being born (0.1595)
eating in a rad mood (0.1600)
that you tend to give money to buskers or not depending on their talent (0.1600)
losing your virginity (0.1600)
spending an entire weekend in your pjs (0.1605)
the indescribable beauty of simplicity (0.1622)
wikipedia (0.1622)
eating bread (0.1622)
being meat (0.1622)
eating meat (0.1628)
playing Starfox Sixty Four (0.1647)
how many times you went back over the archive for Dinosaur comics (0.1648)
Pretending to be asleep to avoid talking (0.1649)
visiting this website (0.1656)
always eating your skittles in prismatic order (0.1667)
busting myths (0.1667)
pudding (0.1667)
eating her out (0.1667)
having roast beef (0.1667)
sweetness (0.1667)
Getting into Miles Davis (0.1667)
eating left handed (0.1667)
wondering if so many ladies turn to writing and reading smut because they crave porn but get turned off by the way it's made (0.1667)
watching 'The Dark Knight' (0.1667)
questioning your sexuality (0.1667)
refusing to accept the modern sense of "tweet" into your vocabulary (0.1667)
randomly meeting people who fill your heart with glee (0.1667)
cheese (0.1667)
not eating goats for a living (0.1667)
christmas (0.1667)
reading the regret index (0.1680)
being able to say 'when I was your age, pluto was a planet' (0.1695)
playing in traffic (0.1696)
being British (0.1698)
having a onesome (0.1717)
hugging a tree (0.1719)
dancing naked ALL DAY LONG (0.1739)
listening to Wagner (0.1739)
neing a super freak super freak (0.1739)
wondering whether Kento, Document, Sarah, and Pseudonym have found the new regret index yet (0.1739)
not waxing your eyebrows in high school (0.1748)
that where we're going we don't need roads (0.1748)
preparing for the zombie apocalypse (0.1750)
a log cabin (0.1757)
staying up all night to watch the sun rise (0.1757)
not meeting Emily Gray (0.1765)
not being one of those women who instantly fawn over babies (0.1765)
Garfield Minus Garfield (0.1765)
planning for the zombie attack (0.1765)
putting on your robe and wizard hat (0.1765)
dessert (0.1765)
getting a lick job from a trannie hooker in the dumpster behind Steak n Shake (0.1765)
thinking of lettuce as just a delivery system for salad dressing (0.1765)
eating a huge nerd (0.1765)
loving lamp (0.1771)
having a crush on the Utahraptor (0.1773)
peanut butter (0.1778)
not switching to Geico (0.1786)
that Venn diagramming is your favorite type of diagramming (0.1786)
sexing her hardcore (0.1786)
breaking bones while snowboarding (0.1786)
painting the bedroom a color other than white or offwhite (0.1789)
still knowing the lyrics to eighties pop songs (0.1795)
that the Index is back, and the old users are back, and it is amazing nostalgic times for all (0.1795)
bacon (0.1795)
'buy one get one free' offers (0.1818)
not going to freecreditreport dot com (0.1818)
spending the Fourth in someone else's country (0.1818)
trying to convince someone you are their Tyler Durden (0.1818)
drawing boobs (0.1818)
streaking (0.1818)
camping (0.1818)
that, in a way, David Carradine's death from autoerotic asphyxiation could properly be termed "a fatal stroke" (0.1818)
eating a huge marshmallow (0.1818)
not really liking MMORPGs (0.1818)
that you wonder if rachel would be in your klan or hoard or guild or whatever when the pokemon mmorpg comes out (0.1818)
bringing up your distaste for Disney music (0.1818)
pronouncing "Intelligentsia" with a hard G (0.1818)
simple english wikipedia (0.1818)
brownies (0.1818)
recognizing the beauty of mathematics and logic (0.1818)
using the word "substitute" as a substitute for "replacement" (0.1818)
wondering whether a centaur foal would suckle from the human breasts or the horse teats underneath (0.1818)
sometimes squishing your own boobs just for the heck of it (0.1818)
road trips (0.1818)
fry (0.1826)
telling your parents you're an atheist (0.1833)
not living in Corvallis, Oregon (0.1835)
yelling "in bed" at the end of fortune cookie fortunes (0.1837)
drawing penises on the worksheet (0.1842)
going to college (0.1852)
having a huge internet crush on Kate Beaton (0.1852)
having a huge weiner (0.1852)
being an alligator (0.1852)
not knowing every ABBA song by heart, yet (0.1860)
eating goat cheese (0.1875)
wearing white after Labor Day (0.1875)
wanting to be under the sea, in an octopus's garden, in the shade (0.1875)
feeling that Pepe is the cutes BYOB corner pet (0.1875)
chocolate spread (0.1875)
not joining the military (0.1875)
not knowing more about Anonymous (0.1875)
watching Captain Planet (0.1875)
eating a butterfinger (0.1875)
foreplay (0.1875)
using the word "retarded" as a replacement for "stupid" (0.1875)
being real and fantastic (0.1875)
living in the city (0.1875)
iTunes somehow playing the same song around the same time every day despite being on shuffle (0.1875)
the metric system (0.1878)
giving that dorky, but really sweet guy a chance (0.1885)
dowloading that song (0.1887)
buying food for homeless people (0.1890)
not actually being bitter or a nihilist (0.1905)
that the sea is deep and full of mystery (0.1905)
being a meatatarian (0.1905)
being the cat's meow (0.1905)
choosing cake instead of death (0.1905)
hooking up words and phrases and clauses (0.1905)
taking boat (0.1905)
shooting Scott Temple (0.1905)
eating a noun (0.1905)
waiting most of the morning for the time to roll around when you can go to lunch at the most awesome hot dog place ever (0.1905)
bondage (0.1923)
not watching the movie Pontypool (0.1923)
being afraid of Americans (0.1923)
telling your mother you don't want to have children (0.1923)
this picture (0.1923)
milk (0.1935)
being in a rad mood (0.1935)
holding cats (0.1935)
earning a PhD instead of an MD (0.1935)
chrono trigger (0.1935)
learning new and interesting things about skin and blood (0.1935)
clockwork (0.1935)
drawing a webcomic (0.1947)
reading pictures for sad children (0.1951)
saving up some money (0.1951)
not seeing Nicolas Cage after seeing Face Off (0.1951)
choosing adventure over security (0.1964)
signing up for Twitter (0.1983)
that larder is a pretty neat, word, a holdover whose anachronistic meaning specifically meant a COLD storage room, but post refrigeration came to mean simply a pantry, but it could also mean a supply of food, the thing itself (0.2000)
British English (0.2000)
not smoking (0.2000)
a glorious fart (0.2000)
jerking off into your roommate's shampoo bottle, not just once but every day for like two weeks (0.2000)
making out with that girl who turned out to still be in high school (0.2000)
how awesome broiling is (0.2000)
masturbating at a Jessica Alba movie (0.2000)
buying the newer model (0.2000)
hooking up with ryan (0.2000)
going on a bicycle tour (0.2000)
being the hottest item on the regret index (0.2000)
delicious ice cream (0.2000)
losing your religion (0.2000)
revealing your nerdiness (0.2000)
liking michael showalter a lot (0.2000)
that crazy night in Pheonix (0.2000)
not having played Kingdom Hearts yet (0.2000)
someday wanting to own land, with fruit growing on that land (0.2000)
ghosts (0.2000)
busting through the heavens with your drill (0.2000)
finally taking a chance and talking to him or her (0.2000)
insisting on protection (0.2000)
jumping in that lake (0.2022)
buying a Mac (0.2027)
not going to dartmouth (0.2034)
making love to your hand (0.2035)
extra sprinkles (0.2037)
Fictional Jimbo Wales (0.2041)
being bigger on the inside (0.2045)
donating to public radio (0.2045)
hot snogging (0.2051)
listening to the whole CD (0.2051)
giving a gift as a surprise (0.2055)
dancing naked (0.2059)
finding the key to the secret garden (0.2059)
liking folk rock (0.2059)
mARRIAGE (0.2059)
lullabies (0.2059)
swallowing (0.2069)
the Lord of the Rings (0.2079)
spending two hours on the phone with your grandmother (0.2083)
being mean to the neighbor's rude kid (0.2083)
changing your cell phone number (0.2083)
the resurrection of the regret index (0.2083)
experimenting with new and interesting sandwich fillings (0.2086)
thanksgiving (0.2086)
not going to prom (0.2088)
sleeping for thirteen hours (0.2105)
wearing a tshirt with a dinosaur on it to a dinosaur museum (0.2105)
pancakes (0.2105)
dinosaur wrestling (0.2105)
eating cows (0.2105)
the Dromiceiomimus' improbable colouring (0.2105)
being Witty (0.2105)
xkcd (0.2105)
magic (0.2105)
Dinosaur Comics' new layout (0.2105)
turning it up to eleven (0.2105)
wanting to take a girl under your arm (0.2105)
staying up all night to watch an eighteen year old paint her nails online (0.2115)
watching the Donald Duck cartoon "Die Fuhrer's Face" (0.2121)
donating (0.2121)
buying a motorcycle (0.2121)
playing chess (0.2121)
post it notes (0.2128)
listening to Beethoven (0.2143)
going to market (0.2143)
using words that are not really words (0.2143)
facial hair (0.2143)
making your time (0.2143)
wondering, if the death machine was made of organic technology, could it predict its own death (0.2143)
disagreeing with things (0.2143)
air guitar (0.2143)
being really cool (0.2143)
eating pizza (0.2143)
the invention of custard (0.2143)
wondering if we can get back up to forty thousand regrets in a year's time (0.2143)
that consomme is broth with will (0.2143)
Monty Python (0.2143)
lying on a futon (0.2143)
not killing every faggot I've ever seen in my entire life (0.2143)
standing the test of time (0.2143)
listening to music that no one else has heard of (0.2143)
going to university (0.2143)
Jack Kerouac (0.2143)
running with scissors (0.2151)
going to the beach alone (0.2157)
using hugs, not drugs (0.2157)
washing your pet (0.2157)
being American (0.2160)
knowing why the caged bird sings (0.2162)
having eaten dinner (0.2162)
ephemera (0.2174)
giggling over a heart's warm cockles (0.2174)
telling your brother he was adopted (0.2174)
punching that baby, despite it's rude behavior (0.2174)
hot bondage (0.2174)
not eating Pizza Hut pizza (0.2174)
watching the sunrise (0.2174)
taking care of knives (0.2174)
purposely deceiving someone who never listens to what you have to say (0.2182)
the death of Clippy (0.2200)
missing the NBA playoffs to watch the new episode of 'Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern' (0.2203)
almost always using the British spellings for things, even though you are an American and your spell check always tells you it's wrong (0.2206)
shooting a man in Reno just to watch him die (0.2211)
looking at pictures of adorable puppies (0.2222)
sending the President into exile (0.2222)
fighting the Nausican (0.2222)
what you did last Friday night (0.2222)
Loosing you religion or faith (0.2222)
feeding the ducks (0.2222)
explaining to someone what the Regret Index is (0.2222)
playing dress up (0.2222)
painting your fingernails lime green (0.2222)
being Anonymous (0.2222)
good times (0.2222)
major tom (0.2222)
being too awesome (0.2222)
volunteering (0.2222)
PIN numbers (0.2222)
being the bee's knees (0.2222)
tiger's belly (0.2222)
wondering what the significance of the qwantz dot com domain name is (0.2222)
getting a tattoo (0.2222)
stealing the enterprise (0.2241)
crying during the first ten minutes of the new Star Trek movie (0.2241)
ever reading that first comic strip on the Web (0.2245)
singing Bohemian Rhapsody at the top of your lungs (0.2245)
xylophones (0.2250)
dancing all crazy (0.2250)
EXISTING (0.2254)
getting over your ex so quickly (0.2258)
spreading your legs (0.2258)
quitting even though the job was OK, but just OK (0.2273)
cooking bacon (0.2273)
cut and pasting a webcomic (0.2273)
staying on the phone all night (0.2273)
having a name that is fifty percent vowels (0.2273)
writing slashfiction about webcomic authors (0.2286)
a lifetime dedicated to public displays of air guitar (0.2286)
not settling down when all your friends did (0.2286)
what happened in vegas (0.2286)
wondering if there's a way to extract all of these autofill regrets into a text file for saving and possibly choosing the better ones (0.2286)
switching parties (0.2292)
optical illusions (0.2292)
sticking with your major (0.2292)
the internet (0.2293)
that dreaming is free (0.2308)
actually finding pigeons more cute than vermin like (0.2308)
preferring women with body hair over women who shave (0.2308)
that you like pie quite a bit (0.2308)
being your mother's child (0.2308)
having a cute little white butt (0.2308)
vaguely effeminate dancing frogs (0.2308)
extra cheese (0.2308)
leaving a legacy (0.2308)
running away from indie cred, even though you listen to some of the music (0.2308)
not knowing who Richard Dawkins is (0.2308)
puttin' on the ritz (0.2308)
birth control (0.2308)
having an affair with the flirty executive assistant (0.2308)
stories about elves and unicorns (0.2308)
filling your thesis with references to monkeys (0.2308)
going to Spain (0.2308)
horseshoe crabs (0.2308)
a French guy who looks like Janice Dickinson wearing a strap on under a fancy ball gown, just to piss off his rich bitch girlfriend and her annoying family (0.2308)
just wanting a sign (0.2308)
reading every single Dinosaur Comic from beginning to end in a single sitting (0.2308)
having an adolescent crush on Christopher Walken (0.2308)
being a pantyaire, like a millionaire but with panties instead of money (0.2308)
dandelion wine (0.2308)
the general awesomeness of blacklights (0.2308)
flipping off everyone you hated from high school (0.2308)
deep fat frying a twinkie (0.2308)
playing god (0.2308)
buying a chocolate bar without checking the label first, only to find it had peanuts in it (0.2320)
spending a whole bunch of time reading random articles on wikipedia (0.2326)
that your delicious cheeseburger was made from a cow whose cause of death was predicted by an infallible machine (0.2326)
chewing bubblegum (0.2326)
learning all the elements in the periodic table in order (0.2328)
getting a credit card (0.2329)
getting out of bed this morning (0.2333)
Grad school (0.2336)
log cabin (0.2340)
spending an entire day listening to the same song on repeat (0.2348)
feeling closer to people in this world of regret (0.2353)
tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (0.2353)
tapping her mana (0.2353)
paying for something with fifteen dollars in quarters (0.2353)
thinking that dinosaur might be good to eat, depending on the species, but wondering if the size of the animal would effect the texture of the meat or something like that (0.2353)
eating babies (0.2353)
growing a handlebar moustache (0.2353)
retiring early (0.2353)
eating food that are high in potastium (0.2353)
going to church (0.2353)
dancing with the devil in the pale moon light (0.2353)
writing the letter "x" backwards and upsidedown (0.2353)
comitting massive regret vote fraud (0.2353)
deep frying boring healthy food (0.2353)
irony (0.2368)
only that you have but one life to give for your country (0.2373)
getting hooked on Harry Potter or Twilight (0.2375)
making fun of people who instigate fights in YouTube's comments section (0.2381)
shit son, I don't know (0.2381)
adding this to StumbleUpon (0.2381)
ice cream (0.2381)
being the latest in nerd technology (0.2381)
reading, that shit is crazy (0.2381)
having sexy intestines (0.2381)
doing it for the lulz (0.2386)
using flesh for digestive energy (0.2394)
missing Efterklang at the Dublin Docklands (0.2400)
following Stephen Fry on Twitter (0.2400)
falling in love (0.2400)
impersonating that person (0.2400)
inventing a maneuver (0.2400)
helvetica (0.2400)
going to an Ivy League school (0.2400)
Paris (0.2400)
broken broccoli (0.2400)
losing your religion, like in that one song (0.2400)
correcting your friends everytime they misspell Dromiceiomimus (0.2405)
penis (0.2407)
orthodontics (0.2407)
still knowing the lyrics to nineties pop songs (0.2414)
chocolate (0.2414)
not being on fire (0.2418)
my high GPA in high school (0.2418)
nothing (0.2421)
going through a Bob Marley phase in college, like EVERYONE else (0.2424)
love (0.2424)
pretending you're a woman to get into nursing school (0.2424)
asking her out (0.2435)
the english alphabet (0.2436)
turning up at Ryan's door covered in mustard (0.2449)
studying linguistics (0.2453)
Skipping the Fiance's family Easter Dinner to play xbox and go to a concert (0.2456)
your haircut (0.2459)
giving up eating mammals (0.2460)
rereading all the harry potter books (0.2462)
buying a Wii (0.2471)
dating someone much younger (0.2474)
breaking up with my first love (0.2482)
being scared of Kefka (0.2500)
being born during the hot war (0.2500)
that aloe plants are awesome (0.2500)
the first time you got drunk (0.2500)
thinking someone was hot just because they were good at maths (0.2500)
lovin' dem pizza rolls (0.2500)
escaping out the back (0.2500)
that English is your fourth language and you speak it better than your first but not your second (0.2500)
hating swans (0.2500)
not giving David Gwilliam kisses before he got married (0.2500)
being a huge nerd (0.2500)
line dancing while drunk (0.2500)
ever saying "no fat chicks" (0.2500)
eating a tasty salad (0.2500)
deliberately misunderstanding offensive slang by taking it literally, ie assume when someone says 'faggot' that they refer to a bundle of sticks or twigs (0.2500)
hugging a koala (0.2500)
getting a liberal arts education (0.2500)
fluffy cats (0.2500)
girls with full lips and wide hips (0.2500)
answering the telephone in a foreign language (0.2500)
lesbians (0.2500)
all of the weird things you are a fan of (0.2500)
losing yourself and dreaming of world that lie between her fingers (0.2500)
underboob (0.2500)
considering eating two dollars and fifty cents worth of raspberries in one sitting (0.2500)
licking out a feminist (0.2500)
tickling her THERE (0.2500)
having low pop culture IQ (0.2500)
books (0.2500)
your sudden urge to make brownies (0.2500)
not having balls (0.2500)
smoking pot (0.2500)
your very existence (0.2500)
falling in love with the majesty of colors (0.2500)
Ryan getting the Regret Index back up (0.2500)
knowing she was gay and still dating her (0.2500)
becoming vegetarian or vegan (0.2500)
going the extra mile (0.2500)
a clandestine meating (0.2500)
that Japanese people LOVE coelacanths (0.2500)
being crazy and or retarded (0.2500)
having sex with your boss' underage daughter (0.2500)
the Pythagorean theorem (0.2500)
sexual congress (0.2500)
being The One (0.2500)
trolling the UK government petition site with stupid petitions you know would be rejected (0.2500)
that you never had a chance to tell Farty McCrablice that YOU LOVE HIM (0.2500)
using my mom's deodorant (0.2500)
wondering what kind of girl would be impressed with somebody smoking, it doesn't seem that difficult to do (0.2500)
ira glass vs philip glass in "glass warfare" (0.2500)
meeting a possum (0.2500)
speaking in spoonerisms (0.2500)
correcting people on their improper use of the subjunctive (0.2500)
wondering what goes through their little kitty brains (0.2500)
girls, ewwwwww (0.2500)
a b a a b a b b b a b a a a a b b a b a b a a b b a a b b b a a b b a b b b a b b a b a a a b b b b b a a b b b a a a b a b a b a b a b b a b a a b b a b b a a a a b a b a b a a b b a b b a b a b b b a a b b a a b b a b b a b b b a a a b a b a b a b b a a (0.2500)
this place smelling like brownies all of the sudden (0.2500)
life being so tasty (0.2500)
never dealing drugs (0.2500)
getting divorced (0.2500)
making pies (0.2500)
eating a minimalist (0.2500)
wearing hipster glasses (0.2527)
socializing instead of playing video games (0.2527)
tweed jackets with leather elbow patches (0.2535)
eating mexican food (0.2540)
dyeing your hair (0.2545)
trying something new (0.2547)
not googling The Underfold (0.2554)
chromatic scales (0.2558)
being (0.2558)
not listening to Billy Zane (0.2564)
wishing you could give yourself a blowie (0.2564)
not trying alcohol sooner (0.2564)
tang (0.2564)
leaving the farm (0.2564)
sexy times with a friend (0.2570)
anonymity (0.2571)
not knowing what the big deal with Twitter is (0.2571)
The Princess Bride (0.2581)
quoting that xkcd comic (0.2581)
going back for seconds on dessert (0.2582)
being a Shakespeare nerd (0.2593)
painting your fingernails black (0.2593)
eating lunch yesterday (0.2593)
white text on a dark background (0.2593)
tapirs (0.2609)
eating all the royalty (0.2609)
eating out a feminist (0.2609)
throwing your underwear onto the stage (0.2609)
bursting out into evil laughter in a crowded or public place (0.2609)
not sleeping with that tranvestite (0.2609)
ATM machines (0.2609)
eating that piece of chocolate (0.2609)
making love above the pub (0.2609)
being necessarily clever (0.2615)
having known love (0.2619)
learning lisp (0.2619)
polygamy (0.2632)
wanting gummi bears and or banana chips right now (0.2632)
cooking hamburgers on my engine block (0.2632)
being vaguely european (0.2632)
going commando (0.2632)
sexuality (0.2632)
taking comfort in the regret index in any way whatsoever (0.2632)
pictures for sad children (0.2632)
giving your best when you know it won't be enough (0.2632)
raspberries, om nom nom (0.2632)
writing a novel (0.2632)
being there for her when she needed you (0.2632)
being winsome (0.2632)
eating that cookie out of the trash (0.2632)
wondering what kind of feelings different animals feel (0.2632)
eating tofu (0.2634)
that shorts are comfy and easy to wear (0.2647)
insisting on precision (0.2656)
responding with Sassy Molassy (0.2658)
popping the zits on your ass (0.2667)
not having tiny brown birds live behind your air conditioner (0.2667)
slowly replacing every part of your body with machinery (0.2667)
alligators in the sewer (0.2667)
Dresden Codak (0.2667)
spooning Jewel's boobs (0.2667)
being the lazer viking (0.2667)
listening to music at a much higher or lower volume than what the artist intended (0.2667)
unpacking my adjectives (0.2667)
taking the last brownie (0.2667)
ordering from Amazon marketplace (0.2667)
Peeing in someone's drink (0.2667)
coconut bras (0.2667)
buying one of each in EVERY COLOUR (0.2667)
letting her sit in the front seat (0.2667)
living in a country that doesn't have bagged milk (0.2667)
that all you know about Final Fantasy, you learned from a friend who really liked it when you were teenagers (0.2667)
cleaning out your bowels through the act of pooping (0.2667)
pokemon (0.2673)
doing a favour that I knew would not be repayed (0.2674)
Wagner (0.2692)
listining to something when you know it'll make you cry (0.2692)
airing out your nughty bits (0.2692)
eating a vegan (0.2692)
that now that the Regret Index is back, you can go back to ignoring your Facebook, Twitter, Livejournal, Tegaki, and Deviantart (0.2692)
going to graduate school (0.2697)
your First Time (0.2698)
losing your virginity when you did (0.2703)
switching majors (0.2703)
a tiny woman (0.2703)
eating pistachio nuts (0.2708)
everything (0.2708)
putting these dumb questions on here (0.2716)
the abortion (0.2727)
being the king of all cosmos (0.2727)
dating (0.2727)
agreeing to casual sex with that hot friend who looks like that one movie star (0.2727)
Werther's Originals (0.2727)
ripping off penis jokes (0.2727)
growing a beard (0.2727)
going to the fancy dress party as Batman, knowing full well that the theme had no conceivable connection to Batman (0.2727)
drinking from the tap (0.2727)
brutal legend (0.2727)
OGC Man (0.2727)
gyrating your leatherwrapped genitals in the faces of those Japanese schoolchildren (0.2727)
waking up late in the afternoon (0.2727)
floating in a most peculiar way (0.2727)
pushing it well (0.2727)
not memorising every Star Trek episode (0.2727)
spooning (0.2727)
going wee wee wee all the way home (0.2727)
going out to the woods today (0.2727)
hasbro (0.2727)
boneless skinless chicken breasts (0.2727)
banjo dueling (0.2727)
loving (0.2727)
joining community theater (0.2727)
the simpsons (0.2727)
being childfree (0.2727)
challenging someone to a duel via a glove to the face (0.2727)
hide and seek (0.2727)
opening a nice, refreshing Tab (0.2727)
that ordinary sentences can take on a really weird meaning when you end them with an exclamation point! (0.2727)
a giant cup of hot chocolate, complete with little marshmellows and cream (0.2727)
making friends with a cat named Badger (0.2727)
taking up the ukulele (0.2727)
not eating my shorts (0.2727)
wondering where all these regretters came from (0.2727)
theamazingregretindexing (0.2727)
making references to poetry (0.2727)
selling your nintendo wii (0.2727)
eating skinless breasts (0.2727)
eating bacon made from pigs that had swine flu (0.2727)
having Clue in your list of Top Ten Favorite Movies of All Time (0.2727)
changing your name (0.2727)
M C Escher (0.2727)
loving Canada (0.2727)
Taking an art degree (0.2727)
eating something you found on the ground or floor (0.2727)
watching Borat (0.2734)
sending emails using your friends emails when he or she leaves themselves logged in and are not looking (0.2745)
the final countdown (0.2745)
having a winsome onesome (0.2750)
living with your mother (0.2750)
fasting (0.2759)
coming on to the regret index (0.2759)
flames (0.2759)
eating macademia nuts (0.2759)
that your livingroom is full of dancers (0.2759)
for some reason having a bias against nicotine (0.2759)
listening to a favorite song on repeat for hours (0.2759)
opening the windows (0.2759)
the existence of the interrobang! (0.2759)
the venture brothers (0.2759)
coming to this site (0.2763)
using this site to admit your regrets (0.2766)
super fat hippos (0.2766)
getting (0.2768)
asking them out (0.2770)
walruses (0.2778)
eating boxed triceratops (0.2778)
eating that last cookie (0.2778)
being a socialist (0.2778)
wondering why rachel has returned to commenting without using her name (0.2778)
being Ryan (0.2778)
liking fat thighs you can not lie (0.2778)
asking them to wait for you (0.2778)
wearing that outfit at the same time she did (0.2778)
the moon (0.2778)
your wares (0.2778)
memorizing Monty Python and the Holy Grail (0.2791)
starting that fire (0.2791)
reading through the entire dinosaur comics archive and then talking like Ryan for the next month (0.2791)
liking songs that seem innocent on first listening, but end up being about serial killers or something like that (0.2800)
taking the boat (0.2800)
going back in time to punch nazis in da face (0.2800)
not owning a single pair of tube socks (0.2800)
coming out (0.2800)
being well endowed (0.2800)
that you were only referring to the subjects of ABBA's music primarily seeming to come from a feminine point of view, but yeah, you don't mind referring to longhaired blonde Swedish dudes as "chicks" (0.2800)
not having an abortion (0.2800)
being well envoweled (0.2800)
spending the entire night going through the archives of that webcomic (0.2804)
referring to water as hydrogen hydroxide, as a means to both achieve maximal accuracy from the perspective of how the atoms are actually connected, and freaking people out (0.2813)
wanting to discover life with someone (0.2813)
zombies ate my neighbors (0.2813)
masturbating (0.2813)
telling him you had feelings for him even though you really didn't know whether he'd reciprocate (0.2813)
boats (0.2813)
doing acid (0.2813)
your gay experience (0.2817)
missing the Butthole Surfers concert (0.2821)
selling myself to science (0.2821)
crowdsurfing (0.2826)
the successful launch of Sputnik I (0.2826)
eating too much at Thanksgiving (0.2836)
cooking yourself a lavish meal and not sharing it with anyone (0.2847)
eating cheese just for the sake of eating cheese (0.2857)
taking an expectorant (0.2857)
having your memories backed up on a thumb drive (0.2857)
throwing meat at vegans (0.2857)
only listening to good music (0.2857)
your fingertips tasting like garlic (0.2857)
every sexual experience you've ever had (0.2857)
tieing your best friend up (0.2857)
not having a penis (0.2857)
reproducing via meiosis (0.2857)
being born after Freddy Mercury died (0.2857)
eating snakes (0.2857)
your double agency (0.2857)
never doing bad things (0.2857)
pooping on a dog (0.2857)
being honest (0.2857)
globalisation (0.2857)
having a detachable penis (0.2857)
taking the Amtrak (0.2857)
wanting to ride your bicycle, wanting to ride it when you like (0.2857)
the death of a disco dancer (0.2857)
not telling your parents (0.2857)
screaming I LOVE YOU from the top of your lungs (0.2857)
that your whole family is made of meat (0.2857)
following a dream even though it didn't work out (0.2857)
the ventures (0.2857)
using drugs (0.2857)
lying about how spicy it was (0.2857)
kissing him (0.2864)
deciding you are too cool to go to the prom (0.2867)
getting mushrooms on your pizza (0.2872)
telling the truth, even though it hurt him (0.2875)
secretly wanting internet fame (0.2877)
intentionally spreading Swine Flu (0.2879)
rubbing my face in a tiger's belly (0.2889)
private school (0.2895)
playing Spyro (0.2895)
going POOP (0.2895)
watching House (0.2897)
mocha (0.2903)
takin it to the streets (0.2917)
not getting circumcised (0.2917)
The Ten Second Rule (0.2917)
loving chocolate so damn much (0.2917)
cathedrals (0.2917)
having that threesome (0.2917)
that Weezing is a member of both the Team Rocket Poison Type binary with Arbok, and the Cinnabar Mansion Pollution binary with Muk (0.2917)
gazing (0.2917)
Philip Fry's eleventh year of living in the future (0.2917)
not sleeping with him (0.2917)
flirting with somebody other than your significant other (0.2924)
tackling her (0.2927)
picking Charmander (0.2927)
sleeping with your best friend (0.2931)
taking the red pill (0.2933)
using only one pokemon (0.2941)
that someone keeps looking at my submitted regrets and combining them to form hilarious new ones (0.2941)
accidentally setting my balls on fire with a barbecue lighter (0.2941)
driving all day in order to pick up your brother, who is coming home for the summer (0.2941)
taking it all off (0.2941)
being a child once (0.2941)
your internet name lasting this long (0.2941)
using ghee as an intimate lubricant (0.2941)
only wanting to see Wolverine because of the hot, hairy Liev Schreiber (0.2941)
rioting with the frenzied mob (0.2941)
adding a new regret (0.2941)
not giving change to what you thought was a homeless guy but was just some dude in need of a shower (0.2941)
coming from the land of the ice and snow, from the midnight sun where the hot springs flow (0.2941)
wondering how one gets a job as a taxidermist and bone cleaner (0.2941)
going to a tiny college (0.2941)
not voting for the President (0.2941)
giving that bum some money (0.2947)
waking up this morning (0.2954)
not knowing any ABBA songs by Heart (0.2955)
laughing because you suddenly remembered something hilarious, then realizing strangers are looking at you (0.2960)
hanging out with strangers on public transit (0.2960)
pressing that big button (0.2963)
geometry (0.2963)
cutting off your long hair (0.2963)
forgetting sarah marshall (0.2963)
chewing on things (0.2963)
living drug free (0.2963)
wondering if anyone has the old regret list (0.2963)
homographic homophonic autantonyms (0.2973)
learning so many digits of pi (0.2987)
eating a child once (0.3000)
living on the edge (0.3000)
looking through all the old regrets you made, using the cache (0.3000)
that everybody's footloose (0.3000)
believing in god (0.3000)
stuffing that lawyer in the fridge (0.3000)
Friends (0.3000)
Batman (0.3000)
your twisted desires (0.3000)
sex with your best friend (0.3000)
that there is no such thing as an original sin (0.3000)
stealing Tucksworth's hamburger (0.3000)
can mine for fish (0.3000)
throwing your hands up in the air, waving them around like you just don't care (0.3000)
cleaning up after yourself (0.3000)
not thinking xkcd should get as much grief as it does (0.3000)
white type on a black background (0.3010)
kissing that boy in Ithaca (0.3019)
leaving (0.3021)
liking shorts (0.3023)
telling people you listen to indie music (0.3028)
rolling around with dogs (0.3030)
puppy dawgs (0.3030)
everything after the age of eleven (0.3036)
going to that party (0.3037)
pickling her (0.3043)
pushing it real good (0.3043)
Irish Evil (0.3043)

most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12566/0.9789)
Kento (2760/0.9993)
turtles (2608/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2431/0.0004)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2336/0.5076)
[ show more ]

most discussed regrets

tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (357)
turtles (291)
your boobs buying food on ebay (109)
the death of Sylvia Browne (70)
not getting circumcised (63)
[ show more ]