nambling young boys into me

a regret index of 1 is ultimate regret
this result collects the hard-earned
experience of 2 lifetimes of regret
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that Rod Stewart is disgusting?
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recent regrets

scusing me while I kiss the sky
agreeing to meet the swan one last time and getting it to admit that the two of you had some good times together, then being mauled by a swan in a bittersweet, tender way for the very last time
posting ever more frequently on r hookupswithswans
harbouring revenge fantasies for months, then running into the swan with its family one day and realising it just wanted to feel free for a while, then being mauled by a family of swans
taking a swan out to see a movie, didn't have to pay to get it in
going through a vulnerable period in which you hook up with a few geese, but it just isn't the same
whimpering "I don't understand, was it really just physical for you" as the swan leaves your bloody and beaten form by the riverside and glides gracefully away
Herobrine Williams
wondering if swans passive aggressively order terrible big gulp coffees loaded with sugar so that they can attack anyone who suggests switching to decaf
wondering if swans like coffee
swans with benefits
you rowing a boat down a slow river on a summer's day, and the swan viciously attacking you, like two giddy young things in love
that you're not sure you would like dating a swan, but at least it would be something that you could say you'd done, and it wouldn't have to be serious, just a bit of fun
voting "no" on the regret "dating a swan" even though you've never dated a swan
busty chickens
Irving Berlin having choke sex with Kento in Kanto
sometimes forgetting that in the Regret Index Canon, the walrus ALWAYS enters from behind
Busty Kento Choking On Walrus For Podcaster
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recent comments

(1) wondering if there was something in the recent comments that finally got Ryan a cease & desist letter
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top regrets

not realizing until you had wasted lots of time that when your ex said he didn't want a serious relationship, he meant it (1.0000)
having no way of knowing whether a new friend, a sweet but chaotic nutter, is alive or dead as of this morning, and having to wait thirty six hours to find out for sure (1.0000)
lolcode (1.0000)
failing to come up with a mutually acceptable third person (1.0000)
watching a British crime drama performed in English but set in Scandinavia in which you are taken out of the action every time the hardboiled cockney gumshoe is paid in kroner (1.0000)
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bottom regrets

using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
The Curious Cans of Benjamin Buttocks (0.0000)
drinking champagne out of a chimp anus (0.0000)
telling that girl in second grade who insisted that you were "the boss of her" to show you her vagina (0.0000)
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most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12078/0.9998)
turtles (2443/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2430/0.0000)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2335/0.5073)
breasts (1440/0.0135)
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