not seizing the moment

a regret index of 1 is ultimate regret
this result collects the hard-earned
experience of 23 lifetimes of regret
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recent regrets

Joe Cocker, I hardy know 'er
Joe Momma
Joe Cocker
Janine, sorry about the baby thing, I'll be in my office
we all float down here, just go ahead now
all these years I've spent unwittingly telling disgusting, dark jokes to a baby
trying to find a quote from She's All That to mix up with 'we all float down here' but never having seen the movie and the dialogue all reading like it was delivered by people with chunky sweaters and Spin Doctors beards
I sleep in two to four hour bursts, two to four times per day
wondering if you were awake this whole time
hey guys, remember Freddie Prinze jr
England is the first to fall, cheerio
October twenty second, twenty sixteen colon the iKettle two point o becomes self aware and begins terrorizing humanity with too hot tea
you have to imagine it would be pretty galling for the manual kettle operators
wondering what it would be like if the downfall of our technological society was brought about by a bunch of fucking idiots who were too lazy to manually turn on their kettles
being a stuck up, half witted, scruffy looking cockeater
Mr Han T Cockeater
Seymour Cocks
Marthe Cnockaert
no TV and no beer make homer something something
discovering The Running Man was written by Stephen King
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recent comments

(1) The Shining really is a great name for a romcom
(4) girl on girl sex during POST PARTUM PSYCHOSIS
(1) girl on girl sex during pregnancy
(1) groping beasts
(1) groping breasts
(1) in sixth grade, hearing a story where some girl supposedly got her first period after taking a hot bath and having sex
(1) wondering whether there are any straight males who are lesbian
(1) wondering whether there are any straight males who are lesbian icons in the same way that Judy Garland, Cher, et al are icons for gay men
(1) Annual Pony Rape Bout I
(3) liking your sex like you like your congress, stilted, formal, and culminating in a bill
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top regrets

kind of loving Gene Hunt, that magnificent bastard (1.0000)
the goddamn deliberately disabled modems Earthlink sent out to customers in the early aughts, cannot enable DHCP without "paying" extra, and using PPoE plus a router with DHCP disables streaming video, FU Earthlink (1.0000)
bragging about being from West Virginia (1.0000)
shows that only have eight episodes per season (1.0000)
regrets about pony blowing (1.0000)
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bottom regrets

sucking her left one until she had a breastgasm (0.0000)
telling the Philippines authorities that Kento is a drug mule (0.0000)
using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
killing the California girls (0.0000)
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most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12561/0.9789)
Kento (2760/0.9993)
turtles (2607/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2431/0.0004)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2336/0.5076)
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most discussed regrets

tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (356)
turtles (291)
your boobs buying food on ebay (109)
the death of Sylvia Browne (70)
not getting circumcised (63)
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