raspberries, om nom nom

a regret index of 1 is ultimate regret
this result collects the hard-earned
experience of 19 lifetimes of regret
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recent regrets

being frankly kind of surprised that Han Solo is both still alive and still getting work
being frankly kind of surprised that Woody Harrelson is both still alive and still getting work
fuck marry kill, Princess Madeleine, Tinky Winky, Steve Harwell
something Princess Madeleine something something slathered in Tubby custard something eh oh!
seeing the headline "Woody Harrelson Just Dropped His Star Wars Character's Name" and being disappointed it wasn't Woody
Ten Boogers
Ten Goobers
Green Boots
laughing as you hew a rough wooden dildo for Mary Chapin Carpenter
Franklin Delano Bluth
Suzanne Marie Sevakis
f FDR because I wanna try it with a paraplegic, m MLK because he would spend most of his time with white prostitutes anyway, k JFK, what else do I have to say
fmk, JFK, MLK, FDR
Ryanair passenger who 'grabbed flight attendant by the testicles' could lose his job
Doritos fan proposes to Doritos with Doritos roses, eh
Canucks fan proposes to boyfriend with Doritos roses, eh
a tshirt that says "I went to Venus and all I got was venereal disease"
getting Princess Madeleine drunk on sherry, then slathering in royal jelly, royal custard, and finally a thick and generous helping of your hand whipped rich cream
wondering how long you stay sucking after she has a breastgasm
[ show all 125254 regrets ]

recent comments

(1) fuck marry kill, Princess Madeleine, Tinky Winky, Steve Harwell
(10) having sex with Oasis
(3) wondering how long you stay conscious after being decapitated being Eiffel Towered by Chris Lydon and a walrus
(1) wondering how long you stay conscious after being decapitated
(1) having a cardboard booty
(2) not realising that the best way to get a British bird to drop her knickers is to do bottomlessly stupid things, crikey
(2) trying to conceive of the enormity of a crime or series of crimes that would mandate incarceration for a billion years
(1) Orly
(1) that the fifth Google result for "Bicoid Babe" is "Bicoid Babe's asshole fountain"
(8) it's still better than having him sucking on your left one until you have a breastgasm
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top regrets

kind of loving Gene Hunt, that magnificent bastard (1.0000)
the goddamn deliberately disabled modems Earthlink sent out to customers in the early aughts, cannot enable DHCP without "paying" extra, and using PPoE plus a router with DHCP disables streaming video, FU Earthlink (1.0000)
bragging about being from West Virginia (1.0000)
shows that only have eight episodes per season (1.0000)
regrets about pony blowing (1.0000)
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bottom regrets

sucking her left one until she had a breastgasm (0.0000)
banging a Tim Burton heroine (0.0000)
using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
killing the California girls (0.0000)
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most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12561/0.9789)
Kento (2760/0.9993)
turtles (2607/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2431/0.0004)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2336/0.5076)
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most discussed regrets

tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (357)
turtles (291)
your boobs buying food on ebay (109)
the death of Sylvia Browne (70)
not getting circumcised (63)
[ show more ]