using the wrong "it's"
REGRET INDEX:
0.81

a regret index of 1 is ultimate regret
this result collects the hard-earned
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hearing the phrase "sexual toy" and imagining a boob made out of legos?
yes    no    haven't done it yet

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recent regrets

Persian that have bigger, plumper faces are considered more beautiful
scoring franks in corkscrew fashion
F#R#I#E#N#D#S# did Jew stuff too
now you're making me want to watch F#R#I#E#N#D#S#
the episode of F#R#I#E#N#D#S# where Ross encounters a tedious, easily resolved problem and ends up screaming about it until someone else resolves it for him
fuck marry kill, Larry David, Dwayne Johnson, Cheryl Renee James
the episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm where Larry David encounters a socially awkward situation and spends half an hour kvetching about it
SIDEWALK Your Enthusiasm
although rock salt and kosher salt are fairly similar
I feel like there's jokes I could be making here which, while largely innocent in content, would not be appropriate in tone
The Rock isn't Jewish
I watched like an entire season of Curb Your Enthusiasm on the last plane trip
you're very chosen people today
not hooking up with the KOSHER deli manager when you had the chance, oy vey
not hooking up with the deli manager when you had the chance
not hooking up with the model actress producer director when you had the chance
keeping Gene Hunt alive through a whole streaming video, only to have him go and get flared up in another game without you being able to blow a pony MOTHERFUCKER
keeping Gene Hunt alive through a whole streaming video, only to have him go and get flared up in another game without you being able to blow a pony
MOTHERFUCKER
wondering when they're going to get around to remaking The Rock starring The Rock
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recent comments

(2) not hooking up with the mohel when you had the chance
(2) wanting to make Kento spontaneously combust for his birthday
(1) just now realizing that Madonna's "Like a Prayer" is about a blow job
(3) that the rachel is back, and she's reading all the regrets
(1) An American says she fell asleep with a headache and woke up with a British accent, cheerio
(1) Toook x Croog
(1) wondering how you feel about pony slash recipe incest
(2) wondering how you feel about father slash son incest
(4) using a messy recipe
(2) unfortunate product names
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top regrets

the goddamn deliberately disabled modems Earthlink sent out to customers in the early aughts, cannot enable DHCP without "paying" extra, and using PPoE plus a router with DHCP disables streaming video, FU Earthlink (1.0000)
kind of loving Gene Hunt, that magnificent bastard (1.0000)
your dyslexia flaring up (1.0000)
regrets about pony blowing (1.0000)
keeping Harry Mason alive through a whole game, only to have him go and get killed off in another game without you being able to do anything about it (1.0000)
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bottom regrets

using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
doing Harambe jokes eighteen months later (0.0000)
sucking her left one until she had a breastgasm (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
killing the California girls (0.0000)
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most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12566/0.9789)
Kento (2760/0.9993)
turtles (2608/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2431/0.0004)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2336/0.5076)
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most discussed regrets

tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (357)
turtles (291)
your boobs buying food on ebay (109)
the death of Sylvia Browne (70)
not getting circumcised (63)
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