Nerd raging

a regret index of 1 is ultimate regret
this result collects the hard-earned
experience of 113 lifetimes of regret
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M Night Shyamalan's She's All That?
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recent regrets

beggen the question
an imaginary old Saxon word beggen, "to beg" or "to pray"
Agnes Blannbekin
Chris Lydon
circumcising Chris Lydon but failing to dispose of the prepuce correctly and thereby allowing it to regenerate into a second Chris Lydon
Chris Lydon's clitellum
wondering if it's even possible to circumcise a bizarre, striated, earthwormlike penis
Kento's windfalls
Kento's low hanging fruit
eating that whole thing of buffalo meat and dying of dysentery in bed
overhearing a forty year old tattooed chainsmoking woman refer to her breasts as "the Koch brothers" while eating at a restaurant you now realize is beneath you
you have died of dysentery
only being able to carry one hundred pounds of meat back to the wagon
serving a cook a mousie
serving a mouse a cookie
drawing a picture of Kento's sanctity being undermined by like five gays
not starting that talking, I could talk all night
feeling like the obvious anagram of "Kento Uncut" is such low hanging fruit that even though it's Kento, you just can't be bothered
Eiffel Towering the sanctity of marriage
hey guyth, remember Lithpknot
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recent comments

(1) wondering if there was something in the recent comments that finally got Ryan a cease & desist letter
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top regrets

not realizing until you had wasted lots of time that when your ex said he didn't want a serious relationship, he meant it (1.0000)
having no way of knowing whether a new friend, a sweet but chaotic nutter, is alive or dead as of this morning, and having to wait thirty six hours to find out for sure (1.0000)
lolcode (1.0000)
failing to come up with a mutually acceptable third person (1.0000)
watching a British crime drama performed in English but set in Scandinavia in which you are taken out of the action every time the hardboiled cockney gumshoe is paid in kroner (1.0000)
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bottom regrets

using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
not being Kento (0.0000)
having sex with a girl who looked a lot like Christina Ricci (0.0000)
drinking champagne out of a chimp anus (0.0000)
holding your boobs when you run down the stairs (0.0000)
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most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12078/0.9998)
turtles (2443/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2430/0.0000)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2335/0.5073)
breasts (1440/0.0135)
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