slamming your dick in the car door
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imagining the reaction of Timothy McVeigh to the statement "Jesus wants you to give up your guns and pay your taxes"?
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recent regrets

Bikini clad Swedish chef makes meal while sunbathing
Bikini clad Swedish cop makes arrest while sunbathing
stealing that innocent girl's Mars Bar from the remote cottage
a group of dissolute rock stars lured an innocent girl to a remote cottage where, having plied her with drugs, they had their way with her, including various sex acts involving a Mars Bar
I want to fuck you like a Milky Way
I wanna fuck a dragonfly
Grab, shake, bite, gouge, puncture, split, punch colon It's enough to put anyone off sex
it's gotta be dogs simply because they are a fuckable animal that are readily available to pretty much anyone, though I believe it may have been horses at some point in history
wondering what nonhuman animal humans most frequently have sex with
pitching an A Team robot featuring Usain Bolt as Hannibal, Liam Hemsworth as Face, Terry Gene Bollea as Mr T, and an ancient filter feeding lobster as "Howling Mad" Murdoch all getting hand jobs
anomalocaridid trunk limb homology revealed by a giant filter feeder with paired flaps colon the movie
pitching an A Team reboot featuring Usain Bolt as Hannibal, Liam Hemsworth as Face, Terry Gene Bollea as Mr T, and an ancient filter feeding lobster as "Howling Mad" Murdoch
athlete Usain Bolt, actor Liam Hemsworth and former wrestler Hulk Hogan
The ancient lobster as tall as Usain Bolt
helping Jack Reacher give a reacharound to a walrus
Ancient Lobster Walk
helping Kento jack in a walrus
Ancient Lobster Shaved, Possibly Kissed by Animal Rights Activists
Ancient Lobster Saved, Possibly Killed by Animal Rights Activists
helping kento jack off a walrus
[ show all 117409 regrets ]

recent comments

(2) helping your uncle jack put on a donkey show, with a matinee on saturdays and sundays and wednesdays too in the high season
(1) helping your uncle jack off a horse
(1) Our heroes don't look like Matt Damon
(1) Pokemon Lying Flat Against the Ground and Run Away Like a Little Bitch
(1) topping for Steve Harwell in Takin' the Back Streets VII
(8) remembering that scend in Pokemon where Ash kisses that Latias in human form, and thinking that's probably Kento's best bet
(1) the kid from Lazytown is a quarter of a century old
(1) two legit two leak
(1) tweeting to a singer that you want to take a shit in her scanties
(1) tweeting to a celebrity that you want to take a shit in their skull
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top regrets

kind of loving Gene Hunt, that magnificent bastard (1.0000)
the goddamn deliberately disabled modems Earthlink sent out to customers in the early aughts, cannot enable DHCP without "paying" extra, and using PPoE plus a router with DHCP disables streaming video, FU Earthlink (1.0000)
bragging about being from West Virginia (1.0000)
shows that only have eight episodes per season (1.0000)
regrets about pony blowing (1.0000)
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bottom regrets

sucking her left one until she had a breastgasm (0.0000)
telling the Philippines authorities that Kento is a drug mule (0.0000)
using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
killing the California girls (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
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most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12561/0.9789)
Kento (2760/0.9993)
turtles (2607/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2431/0.0004)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2336/0.5076)
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most discussed regrets

tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (98)
I would want to bang Jewel if I were not in a relationship (37)
still only seeing black, white, and blue (30)
the actress (29)
wondering whether the kids who are, say, three or four years old now will eventually develop their own interests or if they will be cursed to be nothing but proxies for their dumbass manchild fathers' lost youth and be doomed to like Star Wars for eternit (26)
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