for some reason having a bias against nicotine

a regret index of 1 is ultimate regret
this result collects the hard-earned
experience of 38 lifetimes of regret
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recent regrets

the amazing Personal Masturbation Almanac
remembering that summer after tenth grade when you discovered Princess Madeleine, who proceeded to become the target of ninety percent of your self gratification for the next three months or so
wondering who's totally fucked for Christmas
she's literally bred from the same stock
wondering why the British royals have yet to produce someone even one percent as smokin' hot as Princess Madeleine
Sony executives say North Korea comedy 'inexplicably revolves around walrus'
Sony executives say North Korea comedy 'desperately unfunny' things getting a little hairy
watching a British crime drama performed in English but set in Scandinavia in which you are taken out of the action every time the small french cake is a princess
Sweden's Princess Madeleine expecting second child
Sony executives say North Korea comedy 'desperately unfunny'
things getting a little hairy
I didn't see that movie because Kevin Smith, but seriously, there's no way I'd ever agree to a walrus costume
you can forget about me wearing that walrus suit, too
you're still bottoming though, don't think I'm going to forget about that
I'm just really good at reading people
how did you know that what I wanted for Christmas was to be totally fucked
it's the best thing
there're to women that are attractive enough for me, so I jack off to my own reflection in the mirror, and sometimes I wear a wig or something
there're no novels that I like to read, so I write my own novels, and then I read them again, and it's the best thing
Wrenchmakers of America join with MPAA to sue International Space Station over 'ThreeD printing and large scale piracy'
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recent comments

(1) wondering if there was something in the recent comments that finally got Ryan a cease & desist letter
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top regrets

that the killer what took me is entitilitis (1.0000)
not realizing until you had wasted lots of time that when your ex said he didn't want a serious relationship, he meant it (1.0000)
having no way of knowing whether a new friend, a sweet but chaotic nutter, is alive or dead as of this morning, and having to wait thirty six hours to find out for sure (1.0000)
lolcode (1.0000)
failing to come up with a mutually acceptable third person (1.0000)
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bottom regrets

using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
licking Danish remoulade off of Chris Lydon's erect penis (0.0000)
sprinking chocolate chips on your beloved's breasts as you knead them (0.0000)
The Curious Cans of Benjamin Buttocks (0.0000)
slamming your dick in the car door (0.0000)
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most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12078/0.9998)
turtles (2607/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2430/0.0000)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2335/0.5073)
breasts (1440/0.0135)
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