Teen Choice Awards Colon Miley Cyrus explains her absence
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Miley Cyrus: I'M TWENTY FOUR
Eleanor from MouseMunchers™: I'm sorry, Miley, but the contract you signed with MouseMunchers™, like all those of its parent company Disney, stipulates one trillion years of servitude. SO GET ON THAT FUCKING STAGE AND TWERK YOUR LEATHERY ASS UNTIL I SAY STOP.

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(5) that the regret index is no longer powered by regret
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