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recent regrets

I had to spread my legs when I lower my pants so they won't slide
laying awake and wondering if your body really thinks that three hours of sleep were enough or if it just hates you
showing the court with this doll where you'd like to be touched
erectile witnesses
hostile witnesses
dogs playing Pokemon
orgy duty
twelve horny men
hung juries
having a concersation with somoen about shoes at a twelve hour orgy
Harrison Ford injured in plane crash
having a concersation with somoen
holy shit, did I just write that
I can't tell if you were having a concersation with somoen or just regretwanking, but I haven't posted anything in about twelve hours
any swan's death diminishes me, because I am involved in swankind
any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind
giving superficial advice to a stranger on a strange site because you want to reassure them, when really, honestly, you're just repeating the things you've often told yourself during freakouts
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recent comments

(1) wondering if there was something in the recent comments that finally got Ryan a cease & desist letter
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top regrets

feeling iffy from lithium (1.0000)
forgetting how to brake on an icy bridge and consequently totalling your reliable and beloved car (1.0000)
not realizing until you had wasted lots of time that when your ex said he didn't want a serious relationship, he meant it (1.0000)
having no way of knowing whether a new friend, a sweet but chaotic nutter, is alive or dead as of this morning, and having to wait thirty six hours to find out for sure (1.0000)
lolcode (1.0000)
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bottom regrets

using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
not eating out Kento (0.0000)
sprinking chocolate chips on your beloved's breasts as you knead them (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
drinking champagne out of a chimp anus (0.0000)
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most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12078/0.9998)
turtles (2607/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2430/0.0000)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2335/0.5073)
breasts (1440/0.0135)
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