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recent regrets

Watch Every Episode of Saved By the Bell For a Chance to Pour Boiling Hot Lobster Bisque on Dustin Diamond's Crotch!
I have no frame of reference for a coffee can
getting your bacon in suitcases and your bread in individually wrapped slices
The Curious Cans of Chris Coffee
I don't drink coffee
getting your coffee in cans instead of bags
I'm thinking like a coffee can, basically
I would rather not, he keeps trying to get me to eat doughnuts on Skype
I'd assume that fatworld dickgirl dicks are normal length but like five times the girth
you'd have to ask FanMM about that
wondering whether fatworld dickgirls are so corpulent they couldn't see their erections anyway assuming that thheir hearts could take the strain or whether fatworld and dickgirl physics come jointly into play and they gleefully wave around colossal wangs
Yuge Luther
Trump touts 'Big Luther's' doubleplusgood at Alabama rally
now knowing what Donald Trumo nicknamed his penis
Trump touts 'Big Luther's' loyalty, electability at Alabama rally
a viral video to kiss all viral videos
a viral video to kill all viral videos
joyless sex loveless marriage unsuccessful attempt to kill, Jennifer Aniston, Jennifer Lawrence, Jennifer Garner
I have very unrealistic expectations
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recent comments

(2) I have no frame of reference for a coffee can
(2) I don't drink coffee
(6) I have very unrealistic expectations
(3) BSjWOVis
(1) fuck marry kill, dickgirl Maya the Bee, Pedro Pony, Clifford the Big Red Dog
(2) he was only nine years old so I doubt he caused much damage
(1) never having had a boyfriend, as you are a heterosexual male, although that doesn't explain why you've never had a girlfriend
(2) realizing that none of the birds that have become memes on the Regret Index taste very good
(1) having a concept for an audio book series in which you actually read the book in real time, just not out loud, and offer the resulting audio unedited for sale, but not living anywhere quiet enough to do it even if you still had the means to record it
(1) filthy experiences
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top regrets

the goddamn deliberately disabled modems Earthlink sent out to customers in the early aughts, cannot enable DHCP without "paying" extra, and using PPoE plus a router with DHCP disables streaming video, FU Earthlink (1.0000)
kind of loving Gene Hunt, that magnificent bastard (1.0000)
forgetting to feed your klinoppe (1.0000)
shows that only have eight episodes per season (1.0000)
regrets about pony blowing (1.0000)
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bottom regrets

using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
doing Harambe jokes eighteen months later (0.0000)
sucking her left one until she had a breastgasm (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
killing the California girls (0.0000)
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most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12561/0.9789)
Kento (2760/0.9993)
turtles (2608/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2431/0.0004)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2336/0.5076)
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most discussed regrets

tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (357)
turtles (291)
your boobs buying food on ebay (109)
the death of Sylvia Browne (70)
not getting circumcised (63)
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