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recent regrets

I'm no Arthur Miller or Lyle Lovett
in the ancient spelling bee tradition we shall release the bees
Dave Coulier's "superpower" was farting on command, which he did, often
Candace Cameron's soulless show business mom storms back into the casting office with her daughter in hand and, in true Full House fashion, they are awarded another opportunity for overstepping their boundaries
Phoney baloney Dave Coulier's agent calls him and tells him that the people at Saturday Night Live realized that he's the worst comedian of all time and his stupid fucking face would be a pox on their show so he didn't get the gig after all
Faux Stamos is comforted first by his father's reassuring words and then by sauntering over to those horny broads to tear them walls up
Faux Saget heads backstage and meets up with Faux Coulier, informing the audience that they were pals before starring on the worst sitcom of all time together
Trump to Asian Americans colon "Me so solly"
"They say, 'We want deal!'"
she got terrible taste
A twentyfive year old woman's body was stolen from her casket in a Texas funeral home in broad daylight
he got terrible taste
Virginia shooter Vester Flanagan's apartment decorated with his own headshots, filled with sex toys
you got a beautiful taste
The halfl ings of Blackmoor are charming and honest people, but their size and girth make them less able to perform certain physical activities
you're alone all the time
you're never alone
suspect is hatless, repeat, hatles
surfers always seeming quite sad to you, like when you see skater noids hanging around an office building after hours because it has a disabled ramp
Ryan's old ghost town Toronto
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recent comments

(1) wondering if there was something in the recent comments that finally got Ryan a cease & desist letter
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top regrets

kind of loving Gene Hunt, that magnificent bastard (1.0000)
Facing the dodo's conundrum, I felt like I could just fly, but nothing happened every time I tried (1.0000)
forgetting to feed your klinoppe (1.0000)
listening to Chinese Japanese English hip hop (1.0000)
not being able to use a star to abbreviate Homestar Runner with the Regret Index syntax (1.0000)
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bottom regrets

using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
sucking her left one until she had a breastgasm (0.0000)
having beautiful breasts (0.0000)
having sex with a girl who looked a lot like Christina Ricci (0.0000)
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most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12560/0.9789)
Kento (2758/0.9993)
turtles (2607/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2430/0.0000)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2336/0.5076)
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