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recent regrets

just being kind of amazed that Jack Black ever found work
watching the YouTube video "Year one Funny Parts" and thinking firstly this title is a significant misrepresentation of the contents and secondly why does a lOO minute comedic feature presentation have fewer than three minutes of funny parts
drawing a picture of Matthew Perry eat too much finger! eat too little finger! eat right amount finger!
drawing a picture of Matt LeBlanc eat too much finger!
wishing for the opportunity to peg Matt LeBlanc with the final finger of the monkey's paw, but then the finger bent ominously down and you had to fist him with it instead and it was fun but it wasn't what you wanted
and one of the fingers of the monkey's paw ominously bends down
making a pact with Satan to give you great comic timing and a body so fabulous nobody will ever notice your great comic timing
Stormy Daniels was "truthful about having unprotected vaginal intercourse with Donald Trump in July MMVI," according to a polygraph test report from MMXI
wondering what the details of the pact that young Jennifer Aniston made with Satan were, but suspecting they were pretty much "you get to be the most popular, highest paid actress on TV, but your career will end in nothing but bottomlessly shitty romcoms"
running out of nomos
running out of mana
it's a ball new hole game
a crossover remake of Words With Friends and Tinder, Baths With Friends
taking a bath alone in Barcelona
something something Kit Harington something Kento something the Aristocrats
having lunch with Lydia Lunch in Lydia
Snow closes Eiffel Tower again
drawing a picture of Minnie Mouse be too much finger!
expanding your spandex wang bands
drawing a picture of Minnie Mouse eat too much finger!
[ show all 135293 regrets ]

recent comments

(3) a crossover remake of Words With Friends and Tinder, Baths With Friends
(1) drawing a picture of Minnie Mouse eat too much finger!
(2) I don't remember Minnie having tits that nice
(1) naming your band "Wangs"
(1) shellchested busted nut buns
(1) wondering if there is a median point where the curves of insane through too much sex and insane through too much money intersect, and whether it is reached sooner or later than in the natural state when money is exchanged for sex
(2) making a old woman cry by calling her an ugly mouse, i'm looking at you, old german lady with alzheimer's
(1) that alex could be short for either alexander or alexandra, thus not clearing up the question of whether sa is female or male at ALL
(2) Virgin vs Chad memes
(1) Kids, consuming wieners with ease
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top regrets

the goddamn deliberately disabled modems Earthlink sent out to customers in the early aughts, cannot enable DHCP without "paying" extra, and using PPoE plus a router with DHCP disables streaming video, FU Earthlink (1.0000)
kind of loving Gene Hunt, that magnificent bastard (1.0000)
your dyslexia flaring up (1.0000)
regrets about pony blowing (1.0000)
keeping Harry Mason alive through a whole game, only to have him go and get killed off in another game without you being able to do anything about it (1.0000)
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bottom regrets

using the word "waffletastic" (0.0000)
doing Harambe jokes eighteen months later (0.0000)
sucking her left one until she had a breastgasm (0.0000)
killing the California girls (0.0000)
rubbing one out in the bathroom at church (0.0000)
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most voted regrets

meeting Brian Peppers (12566/0.9789)
Kento (2760/0.9993)
turtles (2608/0.0004)
the death of Sylvia Browne (2431/0.0004)
that you're suddenly very interested in the origin of the champagne out of a shoe trope (2336/0.5076)
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most discussed regrets

tricking a straight guy into dating another straight guy (357)
turtles (291)
your boobs buying food on ebay (109)
the death of Sylvia Browne (70)
not getting circumcised (63)
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